Hi all,

I really don't want to make this longer then it has to be so I will try and get it all out with as much detail as possible but not make you guys read as much. I mean after reading you guys might just be like the answer is plain as day and I am just upset basically in denial. I *am not going to sugarcoat anything as I want the most accurate responses I can get. Anyways, awhile back I met this girl at Church, wanna say almost a 8 months ago. We never really met met each other and we just went out as a group just over the summer. Long story short I haven't been to Church in awhile but one day I get a random message from Bumble (I am assuming everyone knows what that is) and it reads, "Hi John, its Becky from Church." I was actually very surprised to say the least and it caught me off guard because I don't even remember even swiping her. Long story short we talk and agree to meet each other. First meet Tuesday, December 6th ( I know this cause i checked my phone texts in case anyone thinks I am crazy.)

Now we met for coffee cause to be honest this being almost a Church introduction I wasnt sure if she drank, how committed she was, etc.. I mean I like going to Church but I also like having fun. So date went well we actually got food after coffee and a few drinks. Night ends and we immediately agree to hang that coming Sunday. In between we chatted, not too much though cause I am not one to barrage people with texts. There is a time and place for texts but I find it off putting to me and the person to consistently having to text one another unless it is needed. Anyways, Friday rolls around and we are chatting and she mentions she is out with James (another Church friend) and asks me if I want to meet. I oblige and meet them out. I get there, James is wasted to say the least and we kind of just hang and talk. Was another good time, she went home I made sure James got home and that was it. Sunday rolls around for our original plans and we go out and have some fun. Bowling, pool, more drinks, etc... So this was kind of the turning point it was out third date (if you count Friday) and we talked a little more in depth. Told her I liked her she said she like me and she was happy we were getting to know each other better. Great!

We don't talk for a couple days, like I said don"t need to be consistently on each others back but we soon chat again and make another date for Friday, this is now the 16th. We agree to go to a Barcade and whatever happens after that happens after that. We end up at another bar having some more drinks nights going great. Its nearing the end I drive her home get out of the car to say goodbyes and we kiss. I don't know who kissed who because we both had a few but it was good. Totally unexpected. I didn't know how to push the envelope because again this is all coming from the Church so to be honest its very hard to judge what direction to go. She gives me a little I enjoy kissing you we stop smile and I leave. It was pretty perfect to say the least. Saturday rolls around and were talking and we agree to go to Church together cause she is checking out new Churches in the area. We went it was fun she had some plans that day so we went our separate ways but nit before agreeing to hang Thursday tonight! She suggested maybe a chill night and she can come see my house. So naturally I am like ok.

Now again, we chat a little throughout this week but nothing crazy and now comes the hit. this morning I receive a text...

" Hey John. Hope you've been having a great week. So... there's been something on my mind that I need to get out. I just want to say that I think you are genuinely, a truly amazing guy, I have a had a lot of fun hanging out with you and getting to know you. I really do mean that. However, if I am being honest, I think the feelings I am sensing from you you, I am realizing I am not reciprocating. It's honestly nothing that you have done, said, anything like that. At all. I really mean it when I say you're an awesome guy. You've been nothing kind and respectful. I feel like a major jerk because of the timing *of all this and also that I am bringing this up via text. I'm really, really sorry about that. I just didn't know what else to do. Since we made plans to see each other tonight, I thought if we spent more in-person time together dating and went through the holidays and I just let more time pass without saying anything, that really wouldn't be fair. I also want to apologize for anything that maybe came off as giving signals, because I know I did. I think with just the excitement of dating someone new, I sort of let that get ahead of me. Anyway this text is so long. I"m sorry. I hope we can still be friends on some level."

Not going to lie this was tough to take to say the least... I respond saying I really didn't expect this, this is a huge surprise to me and that I just didn't understand. I mentioned I know she says I didn't say or do anything but in a way it was hard to believe because everything just made one big U turn it seemed.I just asked that I hope she was being honest with me in the whole thing... She responded with...

"I really promise you it wasn't anything that you did. Like you didn't say or do anything wrong. I told you, you've been nothing but nice to me. I guess it's just, when you know, you have that "it" feeling. I don't feel that. There has to be more than just having fun spending time together. I do have fun with you. But that spark or chemistry is what I am missing."

Getting better and better right ha..

I basically just said fair enough I am sorry you feel that way. If your feelings change let me know because I really had a great time with you.*

And that's a wrap. She said I will and thanks for being cool about it. Ha man as you can see I really don't understand any of it and I am hoping maybe someone can shed some light. I feel like this has been happening way to often and I am tired of being the nice guy and just want to go back to my young dick head self. Excuse my language. All opinions welcome, thanks.