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Thread: am i being used -

  1. #1
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    am i being used -

    Hi ,please read this and advise me but no negative advise.as I cannot write he whole thing .I think I love my ex boss. She has kids. I have told her already that I loved her , but she says she can never reciprocate. Fair enough. But then I am constantly hugging and kissing her on cheeks and forehead ,Next when she meets she kissed on my lips gently couple of times.I am always sending her presents. She agreed for a dinner .But now she is making excuses. iknow she is mom and busy but how can I take her out ,she been out with me on couple of lunches. Please ladies tell me how to proceed again no house is being broken.I live in London and had to go for one hour drive for the lunch , she also has to drive to meet me.I know in my heart she thinks me as her good fiend and a little bit of affection but not more then that , so why does she makes me confuse. she never called and never text until I initiate them.I don't care if she is using me , I just want to be with her for some time .period
    any help and every help will be appreciated.
    Najeeb

  2. #2
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    I don't care if she is using me , I just want to be with her for some time .period
    Then keep being her male girlfriend and you'll succeed at only being with her for some time.period while she uses you.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  3. #3
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    She is using you, but she may not realize she is using you. You are, however, definitely friendzoned. So keep on doing what you're doing, and eventually she will get a boyfriend and you will be upset. Or you can leave her alone now, avoid getting hurt, and find a real woman who feels the same way about you as you do about them.
    May the wind always be at your back and the sun upon your face. And may the winds of destiny carry you aloft to dance with the stars

  4. #4
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    Maybe she is just not interested. Have you thought about that? If a chic is really feeling a guy, she is going to make time for him, respond to him. You guys really need to get that. If a chic likes you, you pretty much got her.

  5. #5
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    If she can't be bothered getting in contact with you, I can't see that she's using you. I suspect she wouldn't care if you disappeared tomorrow.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  6. #6
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    From her perspective, she is only taking what you are offering to give. She doesn't see herself as doing anything wrong.

    One does have to wonder why you are offering to give so much to someone who offers so little in return. It won't mean she'll like you any better. She'll just enjoy the gifts you give her, but it's the gifts she's happy about, not you. I think you'd be better off saving the money you're spending on her gifts.

    As far as spending time with her, that's your choice. It does seem to be a pretty one-sided relationship though. I can't help wondering if you are really satisfied with that, or if a part of you is just waiting for the feelings to be reciprocated. What you're seeing is what you're going to get. You're being unfair to yourself by investing in somebody who won't return the feelings.
    “This planet has - or rather had - a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movement of small green pieces of paper, which was odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.” ― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

  7. #7
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    thanks for all your help, girls. Especially vertical moon thanks so much , you have almost nailed it .but how to turn tables or at least move forward

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by computerxtutor View Post
    we are both married .she lives far away from me.I did touched her breasts couple of times ( not disclosing the reason ,it other then intimate reasons).so a kiss on lips means nothing .help
    Stop cheating on your wife and get a divorce. Stop acting like a single man-you are NOT single. Do the right thing and let your wife go. Then you are free to pursue whoever you god damn want.

    Some people make me sick!
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

  9. #9
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    Michelle is right, you are acting single when you're not. Either leave your wife or stop acting like a change douchebag.
    May the wind always be at your back and the sun upon your face. And may the winds of destiny carry you aloft to dance with the stars

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