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Thread: Guys, would you have a problem if.....

  1. #1
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    Guys, would you have a problem if.....

    your gf was friends with her ex bf? He broke NC and after a while I decided to reply. We've decided to remain permanent friends but is this going to bring hassles in my next relationship(s)?

    Coincidentally, that was my first too (I was 19 at the time; now I'm 26). However, I'm not going to ever get back with him and he's ok with that. Still, will this bring issue into the next relationship?

    I wouldn't want to end up with a new bf that wants me to possibly end my friendship and go NC again. I won't. He's a person in my life too; I'm not in love with him anymore but he'll always be my friend.
    Last edited by BlueMoonSal; 27-07-13 at 02:22 PM.

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    Yes. Imagine if a girl is friends with ALL her exs. You walk into a party and she introduce you to all the guys that banged her at one point. You don't feel so special anymore. Actually the main reason is sometimes old feelings do creep back up and if your relationship is going through a rocky moment, old lovers can sometimes take advantage of such situation and weasel themselves back in. It's fairly common that people cheat with their exs. Not saying you would. But I personally feel it's not respectful to your current relationship to be close to your ex. For this reason, I am never friends with my exs, even though we end things on good terms. If I run into them somewhere, I'll say hi but that's about it.

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    What if it's just one ex and he happens to be the guy she lost it to long ago? I think if I had other exes, they would just be exes but with him I've realize it's a bit special. That doesn't mean I want to go back with him, just that I'll never forget him.
    Last edited by BlueMoonSal; 27-07-13 at 03:06 PM.

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    I don't believe in keeping exes in your life. Whats the point. Do you not already have friends? And yes it will cause problems with every guy you ever go out with. The only time any person may tolerate a friendly ex is if you have kids and have to stay in touch
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlueMoonSal View Post
    What if it's just one ex and he happens to be the guy she lost it to long ago? I think if I had other exes, they would just be exes but with him I've realize it's a bit special. That doesn't mean I want to go back with him, just that I'll never forget him.
    Yeah, he would be the biggest potential problem of all the exes, and the one that you should most definitely leave in the past. Apparently you want to star in your own little drama.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    It's gonna be an issue for sure.....I'm sure if the tables were turned you would find it kind of daunting if your new love was still in close contact with his ex GF. You would be comparing yourself to her and if she was hotter than you, you would get more insecure.

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    Quote Originally Posted by smackie9 View Post
    It's gonna be an issue for sure.....I'm sure if the tables were turned you would find it kind of daunting if your new love was still in close contact with his ex GF. You would be comparing yourself to her and if she was hotter than you, you would get more insecure.
    You're probably right about that. I would be bothered but I think if they're just friends and don't go all the way to contacting each other at 2 AM nor spends the night in her house or sends lovely messages to her than I'll let it slide.
    Last edited by BlueMoonSal; 28-07-13 at 11:39 AM.

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    I couldn't complain if a gf was friends with her ex because I am still friends with lots of mine. I'd be a huge hypocrite if it bothered me.
    Life is a song - sing it. Life is a game - play it. Life is a challenge - meet it. Life is a dream - realize it. Life is a sacrifice - offer it. Life is love - enjoy it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jffs24 View Post
    I couldn't complain if a gf was friends with her ex because I am still friends with lots of mine. I'd be a huge hypocrite if it bothered me.
    That would fall under the compatibility catagory then. If this was something that you both had in common then it shouldn't be a problem. If it did turn out to be a problem that would be an act out of your own guilt for still having an emotional attachment, romantic interest or sexual attraction to anyone of your exes.

  10. #10
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    It's never been an issue for me -- can tell if someone is too close, if ya know what I mean and then you'd have a word but otherwise, not a problem. I don't get jealous that much.
    Life is a song - sing it. Life is a game - play it. Life is a challenge - meet it. Life is a dream - realize it. Life is a sacrifice - offer it. Life is love - enjoy it.

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