Broken Heart/Need Female Perspective Please...

[tjhook]

Awful Feeling...Lost/Broken Man Here
Really could use some advice...

My ex and I met last March, we fell in love in no time, and got engaged 4 months later (set date to marry in March of this year). Along the way, there were a few problems we encountered...but always talked them through.

Fast forward to nearing wedding time...she came home 3 weeks before our wedding date after visiting her family for 4 days. She was acting very strange...and admitted she was having doubts about the wedding. We discussed it that night and decided to give it a few days and see how she felt.

Well...the next day, she went to my condo to shower, and decided to go through my emails. She found out that I was on a certain medication that I had hid from her (I admit I should have told her)...and flipped out. She said she could not trust me, and called off the wedding. I actually understood her position, and we stayed together but were no longer engaged.

Here is where it gets tricky...she still went to the vacation spot where we were due to marry (friends had invested $ they could not get back)....I did not go even though I had invested a large amount of $ as well.

I asked at one point for the engagement ring back, but all she said was we would talk after she got back from the trip....hmm? I did not like this, and while she was on the trip I was at her home feeding her animals one day..and decided to take the ring back..in which she threatened the cops on me! She called the wedding off but wanted to keep the ring! She said it was me who messed it up and she should keep it as it was a "gift"....I beg to differ that one.

Anyways, things progressively got uglier....she started acting very rude, like not returning texts, taking jabs at me, treating my MOTHER like crap....so forth.

One day I had had enough and called it off between us, and she became emotional and of course played the victim role.

So....we decided to give us a try again....but I think the damage had been done and before long, the games began again.

I am not perfect, but a few things she did included....treated my mother with disrespect, tried to hurt me financially, claimed I took her for granted (I feel was the other way around), and began pushing me aside (even though claiming to be in love with me).

There is a lot more to this story, but I am thinking that anyone who threatens a loved one with the police, and tries to keep an engagement ring after she called off the wedding...I might be better without.

However, I MISS HER TREMENDOUSLY, and am having such a hard time with this! I have tried to contact her 2 times in the last 6 weeks but no response.

Is this thing dead in the water? Am I better off without her? She was my first real love and I truly care for her....I just don't know what to do. Please help me with this.....I NEED ADVICE!

Thanks for reading my story....I need some closure and words of wisdom...please, thank you.

[xxazurexx]

Didn't you post this 2 days ago??

If she was as bad as you claim, why do you want her back?

I'm thinking she was having doubts about you, about this wedding and she began looking for any excuse to call off the wedding. She used the absolute dumbest reason to call it all off, ie:.... finding the pills and claiming she could trust you no longer.

It's safe to say and that once a woman walks away, she is usually done and doesn't return.

[Kelsey777]

I hope you got the ring back. She sounds evil to me. You're better off without definitely.

[sunnybunny8212]

Im not an expert, but i think that she was doing something sneaky while she was away.
Because she looked through your emails (which i do not respect) to find a lame excuse to call of the
wedding and playing the sob story "oh i love you still but im not ready"
yada yada yada. if she wasn't ready, she should have said something sooner not so close to your wedding date...
i can only imagine how you must miss her and love her im sorry you're going through this....
I think you should actually be glad this happened in a way because you just saw her true colors.
whatever the reasons for her actions, shes made up her mind and shes hurt you in about every way,
and thats not fair on your part.

her "feelings" aren't excuses for her actions.
i think you may be better without her...

im sorry....

<3

[tjhook]

Didn't you post this 2 days ago??

If she was as bad as you claim, why do you want her back?

I'm thinking she was having doubts about you, about this wedding and she began looking for any excuse to call off the wedding. She used the absolute dumbest reason to call it all off, ie:.... finding the pills and claiming she could trust you no longer.

It's safe to say and that once a woman walks away, she is usually done and doesn't return.

Yes, I did post this two days ago....but was looking for a womans perspective is all.

[tjhook]

I hope you got the ring back. She sounds evil to me. You're better off without definitely.

Yes I got the ring back, had to take it from her house while feeding her animals while she was on our "honeymoon trip" with her brother and friends. When she returned from the trip the first thing she asked was if she could get together with me so I could give her the ring back....wow. When I told her no, the ring is mine, she told me if I didn't pay her $200 for clothing she bought for me for the honeymoon trip (which I never went for good reason), she would involve the cops for taking something from her home! Maybe she forgot I cut her a check for 2K for the trip that I didn't even go on!

I know I am better off without her.....which is why I am so confused about why I miss her so much.....I gotta get my head straight.

[Kelsey777]

Be strong. You have to get out of it. I'm sorry about what she did to you. Definitely don't go back for more

[lahnnabell]

Getting engaged in 4 months is generally a bad idea. It's not enough time to get to know someone, as you can see here. Her true colors came out well past 4 months.

[tjhook]

Getting engaged in 4 months is generally a bad idea. It's not enough time to get to know someone, as you can see here. Her true colors came out well past 4 months.

Very true, lesson learned on my part for sure!