A Girl in College Class Pursuing Help!

[shocker555]

Hi so I'm a 20 year old guy and need some advice.

I take only one night class currently (community college), one day a week for around 3 hours. There is a girl in our class that is really cute and seems nice from observing, but since it is a night class most people keep to themselves. Also, because most are going to bigger universities so they tend not to be as social because they won't be attending for long.

I am not a creeper who just stares or something, but she is hard to not notice

Now I have no idea how old she is (she could be a lot older) and what if she already has a bf or very well married.. There are some that are around my age, but others who are well 5+ years to me.

Now I know most people might say to just talk to her, but its not so easy I think. I am not really shy, but it just depends on the situation and thats my problem.
I don't want it to be awkward for her or myself, we only have like 8 weeks left together. But what if she is already with someone, and like when there are breaks sometimes we leave the room, but everyone else in the room is like dead quiet. I do think the best time to talk would be when she goes out during breaks. But if she doesn't like me it will make everything awkward won't it?
I don't usually pick girls up in classes lol and I'm not like a full time student.

So its hard because sometimes you find out these community college people live far away or will be going to universities in other states!


I don't really sit near her because most people sit in the same seats, so the teacher recognizes them. If I moved seats I think people would kinda notice something was up sadly lol

I don't know much about the girls personality so I am taking a chance, but that is always the most important thing.. but she just looks kind. I just don't know how I should make a move without surprising her or making it awkward.. she really doesn't talked to anyone only answers questions in class.

[Peter Pry]

I am not a creeper who just stares or something, but she is hard to not notice

Noticing a girl doesn't make you creepy. It makes you a human being. Creepy would be behaving as if you had a relationship when you didn't, or not taking "no" for an answer.

I don't want it to be awkward for her or myself, we only have like 8 weeks left together.

In other words, if it gets awkward, then you only have to deal with it intermittently, one hour at a time, for a couple of months.

But what if she is already with someone

Then she'll probably tell you no. Big deal. Even smarter would be to actually have a conversation with her during breaks and find out before you ask her.

I don't usually pick girls up in classes lol and I'm not like a full time student.

Where do you pick up girls then? You can't just wait around for something to magically happen. If you want something, you have to go get it.

So its hard because sometimes you find out these community college people live far away or will be going to universities in other states!

You don't know her at all. Stop attributing qualities to her that you don't know that she has. You're making up stories about her: how old she is, where she lives, does she have a boyfriend. All of these questions would be answered if you had a conversation with her.

I don't really sit near her because most people sit in the same seats, so the teacher recognizes them. If I moved seats I think people would kinda notice something was up sadly lol

What do you care what other people think? Do you think other people will think you're a creep for asking out a girl? Why would you think that? Do the people in your class not date or something?

I don't know much about the girls personality so I am taking a chance, but that is always the most important thing.. but she just looks kind. I just don't know how I should make a move without surprising her or making it awkward.. she really doesn't talked to anyone only answers questions in class.

You get to know her by talking to her. You ask her out after you've had a conversation or two with her. You have a perfect opportunity to do so during these breaks that you take. People love talking about themselves. Ask her for her opinion on something in the romance area, like perhaps "Don't you think it's hard to talk to someone you like?" and if there is any attraction at all, she'll pretty much take it from there. And listen to her. If there is chemistry during that conversation, then asking her out at the end of it will come naturally.

[QuietLady]

Give her the occasional smile, keep a positive 'aura' around you, and be helpful. If seats aren't assigned, make it a point to sit next to her. Make it a point to acknowledge her. Do all the stuff that sends the right signals. Be goofy. It works, trust me.

[girl68]

say something in regards to the class to start conversation. like one day when you see her out side go "wow, that lecture was hard" then chuckle. then carry on talking!

[shocker555]

i know it might be silly and I am going to talk to them.. but it still worries me if they are like living with a guy or almost married, that would be embarassing

[Peter Pry]

i know it might be silly and I am going to talk to them.. but it still worries me if they are like living with a guy or almost married, that would be embarassing

Why would it be embarrassing?

[DonkeyKong]

i think maybe looking her up in the phone book might begin to enter "creeper" territory...don't do stuff like that, just talk to her.

[girl68]

Dude hitting on a girl you have NO clue what her marital status is NOT a crime! Now if she was wearing a big fat ring and went my mrs. jones and you hit on her THAT is a different story.

Grow up and chat her up.

[Cbrider]

Good ****ing lord - you have analyzed this thing from stem to stern and found every possible reason NOT to talk to her. Any responsible friend of your would beat you by now.

If you knew everything about a girl before approaching her, why would we even date since we know it all? Girls are flattered by guys talking to them, even if they are married or taken. It means that the rest of the world still notices them.

People will sadly notice if you move seats? Really man....come on....if anything they will think "wow, he's got game and guts, wish I was like that." Don't let your fear of rejection stop you, and stop worrying that she is going to a university 900 miles away after class is out.

[MVPlaya]

Grow some ****ing balls. You are going to be a pussy for the rest of your life and this "oh my god, I saw a cute girl, should I talk to her, but what if she doesn't like me, oh my god she might have a boyfriend, and what if she's Episcopalian and won't date anyone outside of her faith, there's at least 50 of those in this county, and is it wrong to stand within 30 feet of someone you like, because people notice when you stand within 30 feet of someone"

Thats going to be you. For the rest of your life. Stupid questions. Stupid excuses. Nothing happening.

Grow a pair of nuts and talk to her. Not for the sake of getting with this girl. For the sake of growing a pair of nuts. You'll need them.

[shocker555]

thanks so much guys! you really put some sense into me.. it was very motivational I must say.

I am going to grow up, I don't want that to be me my whole life. I am going to talk to her in class or on the break, whatever happens.. it will be a good experience.

[shocker555]

Update

Alright.. I have good news and bad news.

In class the girl was there and I did not talk to her. But with reason! Next week I am for sure talking to her the situation just wasn't right. Let me explain..

1st) the class during break she was busy the whole time with some stuff. Usually she is not!

I saw her look at me I think when I came back from break

2nd) I usually wear contacts and one eye of my contacts I got a bad batch, so I had to wear glasses (ones I never wear besides in the house really..) now I know looks shouldn't matter. but I would go in with more confidence, and know I look a lot better with contacts.

if anyone is wondering I wasn't making excuses, I see an opening to talk with her. And I got this opportunity in class to get a good idea how she is and I definitely thought that she seemed like a nice personality. While I didn't get the results I wanted this class, next class I'm going to talk to her!


I think next time I can talk in break or even after class when she is walking out.
I wish I could of today, but I will take a good obersvation and then pursueing next week.