Facts can be hard to see when your emotions are all messed up in love. Here's how I see the facts:
- He thinks you're cute.
- He thinks you might lack in the bedroom department. Take this as an opportunity to improve.
- Sounds like you two are in love. But that doesn't mean you two are compatible. If you are not compatible, you will find that love isn't enough, and things just will not work. And if you get a divorce, you will find out that a divorce is very expensive financially, and emotionally.
he thinks deep down i wasn't happy either and the more i think about it maybe i wasn't but that still doesn't stop me loving and missing him.
I think your emotions clouded your judgement. This is very common in the US. Just look at the 60% divorce rate. Try to put your emotions aside and think about compatibility.
**Top things couples fight about**
* Sex. How often to have it. How kinky to get.
* Finances. How much to spend, how much to save. How much to spend on big items like cars and a house. How much to save for retirement, how much debt to have.
* Kids. How many to have, when to start having them.
**Elements of Compatibility, or, Stuff You Will Fight About**
Here are some items which couples often have a hard time when they are not in agreement. If you are not in close agreement on these issues, you two will likely have problems stemming from these disagreements.
* Kids. How many to have. When to have them.
* Money. How much to spend. How much to save. How much to invest. Which big things to buy first.
* Sex. How often. How kinky.
* Socializing. How often do you go out and socialize, and with whom.
* How much time you spend together. Some individuals like to spend lots of time together, some people like to spend less time together. A healthy relationship requires SOME time together, but how much depends on what you two agree on. One can't play videogames constantly, and one can't always be socializing. The two of you must find a compromise that works for you.
* Family. How often to visit them. Which holidays do you visit your family, and which holidays do you visit her family?
* Cleaning house. Some people can tolerate a slightly dirty house, some cannot. Some have to have the house cleaned every day, or at least picked up. You can't expect someone to behave just like you would. So how are you going to compromise on this?
* Religion. Which religion to choose. How often to go to services.
* Politics. Some people can agree to disagree if they have different political views. But this is rare. It helps if you have similar political views.
I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
(Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)