Update -- exboyfriend

[PTC03]

Hello! Some of you asked me to give you an update with the situation with my exboyfriend who has suddenly reappeared in my life after a year. This past Saturday I met him for a few drinks. At first I thought his intentions were simply to reunite as friends, but after a few hours we were talking and out of the blue he says "you know you want to kiss me". Then we started arguing... about what happened last time, how they would be different, if there was any hope for us, etc. He convinced me (he's very good at that) he really cares about me and always has. He also claims that he has changed a lot in the past year, but the only difference I noticed was that he didn't drink as much (at least not that night). I guess it's hard to tell though from one night whether or not someone has changed...

Anyway... I think I will give him another chance because I can see my faults in what happened before too. Basically our communication skills SUCK! (Which is odd considering I am taking a journalsim minor in school...) One thing that is hard for me to deal with though is that my friends don't like him. My best friend says she gets a bad feeling from him and doesn't trust him. Other friends tried to convince me not to meet him the other night. And, he doesn't like some of my friends either. That's hard for me because I've always wanted a relationship with someone who could spend time with me AND my friends. My friends are a very important part of my life, and I don't want to keep those two parts of my life separate. Gggrrr! Frustrating!

[RogerWilco]

There's usually a good reason two people break up (usually).

It sounds like there are a lot of signs pointing towards avoiding rekindling things with this guy. Your friends warn against him. People on here warned you against meeting back up with him (for whatever that's worth). He doesn't like your friends, and they don't seem to like him. I just don't see how that can evolve into a healthy social atmosphere for you.

Did you really agree to meet up with him not realizing his intentions were almost assuredly to win you back? Seems to me an alarm should've been going off the minute he contacted you.

[Ellynn]

I know how you feel also. An ex of mine just contacted me thru email a few months ago and has been emailing me constantly and asking for another chance. I have my doubts cuz well.....alot of stuff was wrong the first time around.. But, someone told me I should follow my heart...even if it means learning from my mistakes.

Luckily my ex is 400 miles away or I might be jumping into something. He talks about moving back here again....but I don't see that happening for awhile...

But seeing as you actually spent time with your ex....maybe you should ask yourself how you really feel about him. Do you think its worth trying again even if it doesn't work out? Do u trust him? and mainly.....DO you REALLY want to be with him again?

And since the friend issue is at hand... I would keep in mind who has been there for you this entire time. You're friends right? But also, if they are true friends, they will be supportive of any decision you make....even if they don't agree with it. But if it honestly becomes an issue...I would choose my friends.