Dont know how to stop this

[Johng]

Hi there
About 18 mths ago I broke up with my Wife. Sometime after I began seeing someone I work with, this relationship was great and I really think I was in love with this person, she claimed to be in love with me and that this was the first time she had ever loved anyone.

Some months passed and I became very aawre of GFs mood swings, in the end I couldnt take this and calld a halt to the relationhip.

I reconciled with my Wife and we are trying to work things out.

It has been very difficult seeing the other person at work, but we have tried to maintain a friendship
(I had known her for some 5 years pre anything happening) A couple of months ago I went away with my Wife on holiday and I noticed a change in the other person, she couldnt mention my holiday and if I broached the subject she tried to change it. Since then she has acted in a very up and down way when I am about, let me give an exmple;

I arrive for work, she sees me, I say Hi carry on working, she then bombards me with emails, asking when am I coming to talk to her and similar, when I have finshed my work I go and talk to her, all is well. The following day I call her a couple of times with no response, left a meassge but hear nothing. The next day she texts me at the crack of dawn and when I get to work again bombards me with email and calls.


During the week I attempted to talk about what was happening, but she clams up and makes excuses. At the end of this week I get a complete run down about some guy at work who likes her and when I am going home she emails me saying how being alone makes the attentions of this guy appealing (I dont doubt that but why is she sending me this stuff and besides she stated before that she has no time for him at all) I have racked my brains to try and work out whats happening here, the only change I know of is her Sister recently got a BF and I think my ex is very put out.

I am annoyed with myself that I have let this get to me and I realise looking around that there are far worse things going on, but I just seem to have taken a few steps back here and I just want to move forward.

Any help is very much appreciated

JG



















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[pcmaster]

Man just be a man. If you made a decision than stick with it. Show balls.

[xxazurexx]

The biggest mistake you made and if you had wanted to make it work with your wife, was in choosing to maintain a friendship with this woman you had been involved with and while you and your wife were seperated. Because you chose to keep a friendship going, is why you are not able to move on properly...assuming you are wanting to 'really' move on that is. Because she works with you, was no excuse to maintain this friendship. You could have still worked alongside her and remained civil to one another, without a need for any further interacting or communication. And I feel that you are disrespecting your wife and in choosing to keep this 'other woman' in the picture.

I think that if you are serious in making things work with your wife, then you owe it to your wife and your marriage and to cut this woman (who sounds like a desperate, needy fruitloop) out of your life and quit entertaining her dumb emails and ramblings that some other bloke is interested in her...which is being done and said for nothing more than attention. Let the other bloody bloke have her....and wish him good luck because it sounds like he will need it.

[Johng]

Thank you, I feel like such a fool, the power of infactuation was overwhelming and blinded me, fruitloop is a really good description now I think of it.

[Johng]

Hi there to all

I appreciate the advice, but I am finding it very difficult to break the link with my ex, yep the yanking my chain doesn't help, but even if I avoid at work I still find too many times every day where I hear something about her. I know I must sound weak but can anyone offer me any advice as to just how I can break this thing??!

Thank you for Reading

[xxazurexx]

You know exactly what you should do and how to break things off.

Nobody here can help you further.