A Convo with the Ex

[loveminuszero]

My ex of two years and I broke up about a month ago. It was mutual, we'd started fighting a lot. We agreed to be friends, though, because we share the same group of friends and were good friends before we dated. We've been getting along great so far.

Last night was rather random; not only did I end up at my ex's house for a party, everyone left at the same time, leaving us there alone (had I not been drinking, I would have left then, too - stayed until I sobered up more).

We ended up talking about a lot of things, and he brought up what went wrong with us. We decided that 1) being friends was no longer our first priority, 2) we spent too much time together, and 3) I became very insecure, which lead to jealousy and other ridiculous emotions and situations. (After having a month to reflect, I've gained new perspective and confidence; high on life? )

He said that he's excited we can be friends now because he thinks that he can be more open and honest with me, and said that I'm one of the only people he can be open with. I (probably shouldn't have) made the comment, "I don't understand why we can't be together and be friends first and lovers second; we used to. Why can't we just ask ourselves, 'am I being a good friend' and go from there?"

He said he can see it, but needs more time...which really I do, too. However, I realize this is a very delicate situation and am left wondering how I should act. I won't wait around for long, though. Or is it hopeless? Any advice?

[Cbrider]

He said that he's excited we can be friends now because he thinks that he can be more open and honest with me, and said that I'm one of the only people he can be open with.

Did this part failed in the relationship because of your insecurities, prompting him to just lay low?

[loveminuszero]

I think so, but I think also because we stopped looking at each other as friends and sort of lost that respect/took for each other for granted and all the other things that go with that.

[Raze]

Being friends with exs is not a good idea in my opinion. It never really turns out well and things always get awkward.

[andzelis]

Give him some time to think, but not too much, ask him how he is, ask him out for a coffe and so on.