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Thread: Too early?

  1. #1
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    Oct 2003
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    Too early?

    Hey guys,

    I met this girl about 6 weeks ago. A truly amazing girl, i met her through a friend. The night i met her, at the end of the night i asked her for her number and got it. We started talking on the phone, sometimes as long as two hours. Yet she was hesitant to meet up with me. I have gotten to know her friends very well, in fact they are basically my friends and they warned me that this girl has never been in a relationship and probably wants to take it slow. Over the past two weeks we have met up more. In fact i saw her three times in the past week, yet when we go out she still insists on all the friends coming out. I really like this girl, i think she is amazing, and all of our mutual friends have told me that they think we are great for each other. Is it too early to see how she feels about a relatsionship? I am pretty sure she can tell im interested, what do i do? I just pray that me and her will be together at the end of the day.

  2. #2
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    Six weeks? Yes, definitely long enough. However, maybe she's not ready yet. Go for it, but be understanding of what she's feeling. Be there, but don't be pushy. Although, I wouldn't suspect you of being that kind of guy.

    Good luck.

  3. #3
    Tone's Avatar
    Tone Guest
    How old are you 2?

  4. #4
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    Jul 2005
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    Take it slow.. if she wants to go out with friends, then I'd be all the more welcome for them to come on, if it makes her feel more comfortable she's likely to be more open with you, to show her fun side. It's always good to hang out as friends, in groups or not to see how the other person handles it all, especially if theyre new to relationships. I'd go with the flow for now, maybe six weeks is too soon for her.

  5. #5
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    Jun 2005
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    Yep, it'll be a slow go with this gal. But probably it'll be worth it. But you'll need to be patient, for sure.

    For starters, any one on one may be a lot for her. So be okay with the group scenario and if you're lucky you can grab some one on one time within those situations. Like walking her home at the end of the night. Or sneakign off for a quick walk. Things like that.

    maybe her parents are even a bit strict?

    When I was much younger, (even now)....my friends were very important to me, so I wan't interested in a guy 'taking me away' from that scene or getting in the way. So integration is definitely key!

    Good luck!

  6. #6
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    Jun 2005
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    6 weeks is long enough. If you wait too long she may consider you as friend and then it will be hard to change that to something more. also if she rejects you it will not hurt you that much as it will if you wait for months.
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  7. #7
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    Jun 2005
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    Yes I do believe 6 weeks is long enough as well, I have been dating a guy for about a month and I told him the other night that I wanted something serious between us just not right now, that I wanted us to take our time, I don't want to be labeled as anything right now, but I am not going to date anyone else either, I just like hanging out with him, and he feels the same way. We are going to take things slow and let things happen like they are supposed to instead of too quickly. I would tell her that you liked her and let her know how you feel, I don't think that it will scare her away. If so, you still have your whole life ahead of you.

  8. #8
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    Oct 2003
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    Wow thank you guys for all the responses. It is always good to get further opinions. I will be leaving to go out of town for about three weeks in the beginning of next month, so i said i must discuss it beforehand. I guess from until then i will just take the oppurtunity when it presents itself. Tonight, we are going out on another "date." I hope it goes well, ill keep you updated.

  9. #9
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    Oct 2003
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    So last night we went out and seriously had a blast. Went to a resteraunt, then to a couple of bars. We were flirting all night, sat next to each other everywhere, it was nice. Her friend was there with her boyfriend, and it worked out nicely. Her freind and boyfriend were both really trying to set it up for us, and her friend kept telling me she thinks it will work out. One thing i was confused about was at the end of the night, i asked if i should stoip by her work tomorrow which i have done on fridays when i get out. She said, nah you dont have to, ill be fine. I mean if she was interested, wouldnt she want to see me tomorrow? Either way, all in all it was great, and i just got to confront her at some point.

  10. #10
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    Oct 2003
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    Well it looks like tonight is the night. I spoke to her on the phone last night, and i asked her if she would like to meet up after work today, you know, just me and her. She said she can't but responded that she agrees we need some time to talk, I readily agreed. Additionally she said, "it seems like everyone has been talking for us, and we have been talking to everyone but to each other" i said i know, but that we never had a good oppurtunity to really talk about everything. Anyways, after all it looks like we may be meeting up for coffee, and have that talk. I really have no clue what will happen, but my gut tells me that it will not work out unortunately. All of our friends feel like it will happen, in fact last night my best freind told me he would be shocked if it doesnt go well. I guess for all who care, i will be updating you tomorrow on what occured.

  11. #11
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    I'm eager to hear it.

  12. #12
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    haha...you keep talking about what "your friends" are telling you.

    Does it matter?

    Do you expect your friends to tell you "Well, I really don't think this is going to work. Niether of you are ready for this. You should dump her now and get it over with..."

    OF COURSE your friends are going to pat you on the back. What the hell do they know about anything??

    This chick doesn't like you "Like that". If she did, she would want to **** you by now. She would want to go out ALONE with you by now. She would at the VERY LEAST give you some sort of explanation as to WHY you are always going out with friends!

    Wake up and smell the breakup man. Confront this chick NOW, or be a pussy lapdog the rest of your life with either her, or any other broad down the road that strings you along like this one is.
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