i really did. she made quite a first impression on me. she was really sweet and she was very cute, in a non-ditzy way. very intelligent she seems.
she is in my freshman class at my college too.
the problem:
she was/is a party girl... i am not sure what kind she is now. i dont' mean the have-a-few-beers-and-laugh kind of party girl. i mean the kind that flirts with all the guys, that doesn't give a **** about anything, trying to **** 'em. the kind of girl that if you were her boyfriend, you'd have to worry about whether or not she is cheating on you when she is going to 'check out a local party' or some shit.
i never really was interested in those types of girls because i can't trust someone that is only about fun and games. can you?
now i am getting to the point where i am so desperate that i forget what i actually want out of a relationship and just want a relationship.
*sigh* it seems like there is nobody that can give me what i need out of a relationship. sure, she is either good looking and has no morals, or she is a chunky marshmellow like jesus that has never lied before. and if it's not her, it's my ****ing haircut, my inability to be cool and popular, or some other thing that i don't care about.
is this one of those things that happens when you least expect it? i wish i would be on a rollercoaster or something and at the top of a hill look to the person next to me and kiss the person. bam. like that.
i think i'll drink a tall glass of shut the **** up now.