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Thread: When to call it quits?

  1. #1
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    When to call it quits?

    So little backstory first. Been single for four months, and I have feelings for my ex’s friend (I know the implications behind it but I feel like I don’t owe anything to my ex). About a month and a half after the break up the friend made it known he thought it would better for he and I to just be friends and not mess anything up. That was fine with me then.

    In the meantime we’ve hung out here and there… he helped me with some things when I broke my leg. We hang out I’d say three times a month or so. Usually dinner and then a lot of time we come back to my apartment and play video games or watch a movie.
    Anyway… the last few times we’ve hung out I’ve left the evening feeling frustrated. I want more. Being ‘just friends’ is leaving me feeling depressed and irritated.

    What’s the right thing to do?

    He already made it known that he just wants to be friends so is there a point in bringing up how I feel now or is it time for me to gracefully exit the situation?
    Ted, how do I explain this to you. Last night, I ate the best cake of my life. Do you think I'm gonna let that cake out of my life? Hell no. I'm gonna find out what bakery made that cake and I'm gonna get some more cake.

  2. #2
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    If it was me in this situation, i would bring it up..
    You seem like pretty decent friends enough to be able to sit and explain how your feeling when your with him. Who knows, he might feel the same way now after hanging out with you and time has passed since your breakup!
    If he sticks to the friends deal.. Just give a simple 'okay!'. Then just stop hanging out with him all together.. Who knows, when he doesnt have you as a friend.. He might want to have something to do with you.. More than friends.

    Good luck!!

  3. #3
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    Remember, you live once and don’t waste your life time with regret. At least you should be honest to your self and to him of course. Say what you feel, what you want because you have right to be happy. If he doesn’t feel and want the same, it’s ok because it’s not the end the world. Say that you appreciate his pure feeling to you and you don’t blame him if he just wants to be a friend to you and say that you need time to release your feeling before you accept him as really friend to your life so you will take space to go away from him for while. You will not hang out with him or get any contacts with him until you have forget your feeling. At least you will know what his feeling is and you wont death in doubt. So good luck and do the best for your life

  4. #4
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    you exs friend? hmmm that doesnt sound right even thou u feel like you dont owe your ex.out of all the guys in this world u go for your exs friend .i just dont see maself doing that ..its crazy .moving from one guy to his friend the bad thing is they will start talking about u especially when u sleep with both they will even laugh at you and make u look like a hoe .just know tht wateva it is i dont think its worth it .

  5. #5
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    Like I said I know how it looks Queentee. But I'm fine with it because I know that's not how it is. The ex and I dated for a year in a half in that time I got to know his friend and he's been a very good to friend to me in and out of the relationship.

    I had feelings for him even in the relationship but felt like that was not the right thing to explore. When my ex broke up with me it was when I needed him the most and he just didn't want to deal with me, and chose to start sleeping with his ex instead. His friends were there for me.

    I respect if his friend doesn't feel right about it, but given the situation I'm totally fine with it. Enough time has past that I'm certain it's not about rebound or revenge. I honestly want to have a relationship with him. I'm sure I could go out and find someone else, but the qualities his friend has are tough to come across. It seems silly to deny myself happiness for someone who didn't care about my happiness in the first place.

    I'll take the hoe moniker if it means being in a relationship with a person that respects me, doesn't cut me down, and keeps me laughing.
    Ted, how do I explain this to you. Last night, I ate the best cake of my life. Do you think I'm gonna let that cake out of my life? Hell no. I'm gonna find out what bakery made that cake and I'm gonna get some more cake.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Queentee View Post
    you exs friend? hmmm that doesnt sound right even thou u feel like you dont owe your ex.out of all the guys in this world u go for your exs friend .i just dont see maself doing that ..its crazy .moving from one guy to his friend the bad thing is they will start talking about u especially when u sleep with both they will even laugh at you and make u look like a hoe .just know tht wateva it is i dont think its worth it .
    Why? What level of ownership does her ex have? Screw that, it's her life.

  7. #7
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    I concur with JadenMia.

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