late first time?

[JerryThomson]

Hi,

What do you think? What is the best age to get the first time?
Would you consider 22 as (still) normal or too late?

How old were you?

Thnx

[SpaZz]

Its not uncommon... I know a few ppl who still haven't slept with anyone and their in there 20s... but in this day and age its fast becoming very rare to find someone in their 20s that hasn't slept with anyone yet. Though you find that these ppl are usually holding out for that special someone (or just can't find anyone). Whatever the case I think it all boils down to what is considered normal in your area... but more importantly what you want out of the experience, are you just looking to get it over and done with? or Do you want it to be with someone you really love?

[daletom]

Wedding night virgins

Thoughts & Advice:

Do it with somebody who at least knows your situation, and respects you and will put forth a little special effort. Allow plenty of time.

Sex can be very pleasureable without love; it won't create or replace love, but it adds VERY MUCH to an already established loving relationship.

Wait for marriage? It's certainly something very special to share with your partner, but if I'd done more "playing around" before marriage I probably would have been more faithful . . .

I'd suggest bringing a virgin to orgasm before trying intercourse: for guys, it will slow down his response a bit, and make it better for her. For girls, it will make her as open and lubricated as she'll ever be. If you're BOTH virgins - this is even MORE important to improving the quality of the sex. If you're intending to be life partners a (physiologically) poor first experience may not matter in the long run, but if you haven't made that commitment you should probably put a little effort into making the first time "good".

"It doesn't matter as much to guys."? BULL!! It matters just as much, though possibly in a different way.


OK - My First Time!
Well, let's see - we were both 23(!) and both still virgins. It was our wedding night, 1974. It was lousy sex. It was almost consensual rape. It was also extremely significant for both of us. We are still married - yes, to each other. (Although I occasionally remind her of the list I'm keeping of all the things my NEXT wife will, or will not, do.)

We had planned ahead - our wedding was 1:00 in the afternoon especially so that we could have a reception, and start making love at a decent hour. We had known each other for about a year, and been engaged for 10 months. In the last few months of the engagement we had done just about "everything but . . .". I helped her to her first orgasm (her thighs around my ears) and she had done me orally, manually, and dry humping so we weren't exactly ignorant of each others' responses.

We had talked about postponing it, but I think we both knew we were going to do it. We got to our room about 7:00 pm and started deep kissing before the door latched. She gave me a choice: she'd get into one of her "honeymoon nighties", or I could undress her, or she could undress herself (while I waited in the bathroom - I never quite understood that part!) and wait for me under the covers. I selected the nightie. She went to the bathroom to get ready, and I got into pajamas and waited on the bed.

She came out wearing a yellow gauze creation that was only faintly see-through. We talked and stalled a bit. We read each other some love poetry (not original) and Bible verses. This wasn't agreed upon beforehand - we each intended to surprise the other with this romantic touch. We embraced and started necking. Probably 30 - 45 minutes later the clothes were off and I was eating her. After a LONG time of this (we agree that it was 15 minures or more) I was frustrated that I couldn't bring her to climax, as I'd intended immediately before entry.
(During our lovemaking while engaged I had noticed how open and wet she was immediately after orgasm, and knew that was the best time to enter her. I also knew that it took only 5 - 10 minutes to bring her to climax.)

She said, "I'm ready." Big (sexual) mistake! I should have known she wasn't ready. She probably knew she wasn't. We put a pillow under her bottom and put KY Jelly onto our genitals. From some book we had read together we thought these steps would make it better. She raised her knees and spread her thighs. I'd never been so excited - pounding heart, dry mouth, etc. I climbed on top. She hugged me and I tried to make entrance.


It hurt! I couldn't find the opening! I mashed my cock head against something. OUCH! I thrust and bent my erection. Extreme OUCH!! I was embarassed, frustrated and impatient. Eventually, I found what felt like the right place. I knew I wasn't really in - my cock head was painfully pinched. When I tried to push in, she'd pull back. When I pulled back, she moved with me so I never could get a run at her.

After 5 - 10 minutes of this we were both tense, frustrated, embarassed and sore. This was NOT what either of us expected. I paused to catch my breath. We looked into each others' faces, without a clue of what to say or do. I should have rolled off and started a long session of cuddling and fondling. But I felt her relax just a little, and without thinking about it or meaning to I rotated my hips in a full circle. I didn't actually feel her tear, but I felt myself slip in.

She felt it too. She didn't scream, but she definitely vocalized her physical discomfort. She jerked and pulled her knees up, toward her chest, trying to squirm away. Bad tactic - it made everything line up just right, and I went all the way in. Again, not that I planned it, it was just the way we were positioned, how she moved, where my weight was, etc.

I HAD NEVER FELT ANYTHING SO GOOD!

She began to cry.

GOD IT FELT GREAT!

I thought, "I'm raping my virgin lover on our wedding night.".

THIS FEELS SO WONDERFUL THAT SHE MUST CERTAINLY FEEL IT TOO!

Instinctively, I started stroking. She was sobbing. Mercifully, I only lasted about 30 seconds, probably half a dozen strokes.

The contractions were still running through me when I felt ashamed and sorry for what I'd done. I uncoupled quickly, and saw what a bloody mess we'd made. Previously, while she was getting dressed to be undressed, I had run warm water in the sink and had a washcloth and towel ready. It was probably the only thing I did right, although I expected to be cleaning up love juices rather than blood. Nevertheless I spent a long time bathing her genitals in warm water and assuring her that I loved her (which was true) and she was a great sex partner (as if I really knew!) and it was everything I'd hoped it would be (I should have been struck by lightning for telling that whopper!). We cuddled for a long time - she didn't say many words, but her body recited an eloquent love poem.

About 11:00 we went down to the coffee shop and had ice cream. While sitting there, she noticed a slightly pink stain in the crotch of her white shorts. Thinking her period had come a week early (she's always been very irregular) we hurried back to the room. Well, that's not what it was. In all of our sex education, nobody had pointed out that "what goes in, must come out", and her maidenhead was bidding an oh-so-faint farewell. She came out of the bathroom with no pants on, and said "Let's do it again.".

The second time was much better. We were more relaxed, unpressured, and we put her on top. The next day, on our fourth session, she finally had her first married orgasm. It was from cunnilingus, not intercourse, but we were both pleased with that. (It was almost a week before she started coming from ****ing.) All told we did it 5 times in the first 24 hours of our marriage - and haven't kept count since.

[Illusional]

i think that by age 18, somewhere around 90 percent of all teens have been devirginized. raverboy

[britishchick]

Iwas 16 when i had sex for the first time!

[swimmingNreverie]

I'm 20, and I'm someone who was raised to wait till marriage, and although now i've pretty much decided to wait until I'm truly in love, I see nothing wrong with the fact that i've waited--in fact, i'm glad I have. None of the guys I have been with in the past would have been worth it. I'm saving it for something great.

[JerryThomson]

Thank you all for your kind replies, I think now I can visualize the situation.

J. Thomson

[leight69]

I was 20 when I had sex for the first time. The girl I lost my virginity to was 18 at the time...and she first had sex when she was 15.

[Curlz]

First time should be because you actually want to. My first time was when I was 21, and was more to just get it out of the way. While I don't regret it, I wish that I had saved it till I met someone that I wanted to share the experience with. But that's life, I guess.

[CR's Baby Girl]

personally i dont think there is such a thing as a late first time. you do it when you feel comfortable and trust the person 100% and love them. not b/c you think you should have lost it b/c of your age. i dont think age matters one bit.

[nendo]

theres is no deadline for ur first time. hell somepeople die at like 80-90 and r still virgins. somepeople rush into it because they want to be cool. which is pathetic rely. people do it when there in love which rely is the rel reason people should do it.

[Illusional]

yeah, look at the pope. raverboy

[Breezy18]

I think age matters. I just feel that the more mature you are, the better equipped you'll be to handle the emotional side of it. I don't think 20 is too young, NOR too old to be a virgin. It's a very individual thing. And something everyone should decide for themselves and not be coerced into because someone else is, (for lack of a better word), horny.

[Nice Lover Boy]

Well, I gave it up when I was 17. But seriously, I didn't enjoy giving it up until I was 20. I guess them married women know how to present you to real sex at a young age. But being 22 is not too late. being 25 and over is. I have friends that masturbate who are 27. They just can't get women at all. I have to hook-them-up!

[nendo]

being 25 and over is.

y is it. rely i guess it comes down to personal opinion rely dont it