Scared to fall in Love(part 2)

[Nice Lover Boy]

It has come to my conclusion to never have a girl as a best friend anymore. This night was suppose to be my night. I was suppose to own the stars and the moon. And love was suppose to surround me and my non-existing love of my life. I have been with my friend where we were suppose to go and after, she had to go home right away. It was like she wanted to be home in a hurry to watch the re-run of Friends. I'm being sarcarstic. But I invited her to go with me somewhere and answered with, "let me check what is going on that day, but yeh, I want to go". But it wasn't like the excitement that I always heard coming out of her. But after I had drop her off, all she sais was "good-bye". That's all. I want to call her to let her know that this idea should be off. But, this place is where she always wanted to go. So....would it be a good idea for me to call her and tell her that this ain't a good idea anymore. Anyways, I feel like shit now, I shouldn't be home early, I should of still be out there with her. What am I suppose to do? I can't sleep unless my body and mind gives out. It's gonna be a long night....

[Fawn]

awww... I'm so sorry! It seems so odd that her attitude towards you has changed so much. I really didn't expect that to happen. If you really don't want to go with her to that place she likes, then you'll have to tell her. It basically seems that she's tearing you apart without even knowing how much you care. I still think that in the long run you should tell her your feelings. Even if she doesn't reciprocate, its better to get those feelings out, or else they will keep bottling itself up until you explode.

[Nice Lover Boy]

awww... I'm so sorry! It seems so odd that her attitude towards you has changed so much. I really didn't expect that to happen. If you really don't want to go with her to that place she likes, then you'll have to tell her. It basically seems that she's tearing you apart without even knowing how much you care. I still think that in the long run you should tell her your feelings. Even if she doesn't reciprocate, its better to get those feelings out, or else they will keep bottling itself up until you explode.

You know something Fawn, you are absolutely right. I am going to let her know how much I cared to keep her happy. I'm gonna let her know the things I would go through just to see her smile sustaining. I'm gonna let her know how much time and pain I went through finding her the gift she's been always wanting. And this gift will haunt her for the rest of her life because it's a gift that she will never run away from and she will have no choice but to think about me over and over again. I ditch so many women just to make sure that life was dedicated to her. But now, I have to change my posture and find them to return myself as the "bad boy" I was once again.

[LucidDream]

Girls are fine as best friends, it's only when you fall for them things get... interesting, lol.

I wouldn't talk about how much it hurts though. From what I've seen happen to others, and narrowly avoided myself, that usualy gets a bad reaction back.

And while you are talking, try to pick up hints on how she feels, rather than just wait till you have stoped talking to see how she feels. It makes it easier to tell if you're coming on too strong earlyer.

I think she is just going through a rough patch at the moment, it might not have anything to do with you. Try asking her what's wrong.

[Fawn]

You know something Fawn, you are absolutely right. I am going to let her know how much I cared to keep her happy. I'm gonna let her know the things I would go through just to see her smile sustaining. I'm gonna let her know how much time and pain I went through finding her the gift she's been always wanting. And this gift will haunt her for the rest of her life because it's a gift that she will never run away from and she will have no choice but to think about me over and over again. I ditch so many women just to make sure that life was dedicated to her. But now, I have to change my posture and find them to return myself as the "bad boy" I was once again.

I deffinitly want to hear how this one has played out.
I think your doing the right thing though. Plus listen to a what Lucid said as well. He has some good points.

And ... ummm... "bad boy"... you found my weakness... *drools* ... lol...
You must also realise that you have changed a bit since that "bad boy" image. You have to be yourself, thats what really counts.

[Nice Lover Boy]

I deffinitly want to hear how this one has played out.
I think your doing the right thing though. Plus listen to a what Lucid said as well. He has some good points.

And ... ummm... "bad boy"... you found my weakness... *drools* ... lol...
You must also realise that you have changed a bit since that "bad boy" image. You have to be yourself, thats what really counts.

Since the begining of time in High School, I fell in love with a girl of my dreams. The relationship did not work, I was somewhat used for sexual needs and desires. But I was in love, but she doubted me after because I thought that since she was a grade older, I thought things would be the same as a freshmen. But that was 4-6 years ago. Since then, it's been nothing but flings, one nighters, and affairs. I learned about it and more. But then I have this friend whom I'd never mess with. But then signals started flying and I wanted to quit my "bad boy" image because this action felt too good. So I started getting the impression that she liked me. All her friends asked me, "are you going to ask her out"? All I said was that we were cool. But then she stop being the friend that I knew. Signals fell to the floor from the sky and it was no more. So that is why I want to head to my normal self again as a "bad boy" because I know that I wont hurt as much as it will hurt.
Lucid, I dunno if it's a good idea to ask her what is the matter? You know how young girls are, always undecisive about things and what they want. We are 3 years apart. I am much older. But I think that if she is being different, it's because she hasn't gotten over her ex yet, or she is seing that she likes her other guy friend more then me(which the other guy is unattracted), but u never know? But I will speak with her and let time pass us by.

[Colleen]

LOL! "My time, nuff said!" You said a mouthful!

Ok, I am 41 and I've only been posting a coupla weeks. Not many posts have anything to do with me right now, but they are things I can advise about from my past. YOUR post is the first so far that relates to me.

I totally agree that after so much giving it has to be our time. Three weeks ago after a 15 hour work day I stopped by the grocery to get my 28 year old boy toy his favorite beer. We watched his choice of movie, made love twice and in the morning I woke him up twice with sex before laying out his towel and making him waffles and bacon for breakfast. He was feeling squiggish from hangover and I suggested he take a thirty minute nap before going to his pizza delivery job. I was being mushy and sweet and he had the nerve to say, "I don' like being babied. Makes me uncomfortable." Well I countered with (In Stepford Wives sweetness) "Oh, I am SO glad you let me know, you just saved me a WHOLE lotta time and effort!"

Suffice to say he has not called me nor I him in three weeks. And I am SO OK with that! Do not EVER waste time and romantic energy on an emotional squid. Our ability to love and romance is a sign of our creativity and if a person does not fathom that, well, then they are shallow idiots. Only a FEW are blessed with real feeling and creativity. Sadly they (we) are the very ones who bitch and moan over being shit on by the clueless (myself included until my BF of three years dumped me out of sheer cowardice.) It is OK to feel duped cause we are. But that doesn't make us stupid. We just need to redirect that energy to real people who deserve it.

Be patient. There is someone out there who will CREAM over what you can offer!

Leenie

[Fawn]

LOL! "My time, nuff said!" You said a mouthful!

Ok, I am 41 and I've only been posting a coupla weeks. Not many posts have anything to do with me right now, but they are things I can advise about from my past. YOUR post is the first so far that relates to me.

I totally agree that after so much giving it has to be our time. Three weeks ago after a 15 hour work day I stopped by the grocery to get my 28 year old boy toy his favorite beer. We watched his choice of movie, made love twice and in the morning I woke him up twice with sex before laying out his towel and making him waffles and bacon for breakfast. He was feeling squiggish from hangover and I suggested he take a thirty minute nap before going to his pizza delivery job. I was being mushy and sweet and he had the nerve to say, "I don' like being babied. Makes me uncomfortable." Well I countered with (In Stepford Wives sweetness) "Oh, I am SO glad you let me know, you just saved me a WHOLE lotta time and effort!"

Suffice to say he has not called me nor I him in three weeks. And I am SO OK with that! Do not EVER waste time and romantic energy on an emotional squid. Our ability to love and romance is a sign of our creativity and if a person does not fathom that, well, then they are shallow idiots. Only a FEW are blessed with real feeling and creativity. Sadly they (we) are the very ones who bitch and moan over being shit on by the clueless (myself included until my BF of three years dumped me out of sheer cowardice.) It is OK to feel duped cause we are. But that doesn't make us stupid. We just need to redirect that energy to real people who deserve it.

Be patient. There is someone out there who will CREAM over what you can offer!

Leenie

OMG! I can't believe you did all that for him! If I had a guy do anything close to that I would be putty in his hands.

I think the only REAL problem I see here is that you pick the wrong people to be giving your heart too. Its true, you have to be patient because someone is going to love & care for you just as much. You both deserve so much more!

[Nice Lover Boy]

LOL! "My time, nuff said!" You said a mouthful!

Ok, I am 41 and I've only been posting a coupla weeks. Not many posts have anything to do with me right now, but they are things I can advise about from my past. YOUR post is the first so far that relates to me.

Be patient. There is someone out there who will CREAM over what you can offer!

Leenie

I really wish me and you can communicate a little more. I assume that you read my entire article of immature love. If not, the part one of this episode coould be found. You see, this feeling that has been crushed comes from a friend, a good friend of the opposite sex. And I always told myself to never find a friend of the opposite sex because of fiercfull situations as these. So, I gave it a shot and I find myself at the bottom of the barrow now. Yes, I am duped, but it's not the same as getting "duped" over someone you want for sexual needs. She was my only star I would dare to come out at night to see. She's the only reason I would climb the highest mountain just to see if she's still okay. She is my eternal sunshine. I know all this talk can sound better with a violin, but bitter hasn't strucked me yet. I will still send her my X-mas gift because I haven't forgotton the rule of being human and valuable as a primary gentleman. I just surely hope that I receive a response back from her from this gift. But I hope we can talk soon on other events. I too use to be a "boy toy". Just thought we could talk about that in order to cheer me up. Please.
by the way, "My Time" and "Nuff Said" was my quote after being dismissed from my 1st love.

[Cybog]

Colleen if you lived in southern Cali, I would be happy to wait in line as one of your boy toys

[LucidDream]

Originally Posted by Nice Lover Boy
ByYou know how young girls are, always undecisive about things and what they want.

They usualy find their feet after a while though, and her distance might be a sign of her trying to gather her thoughts.
I just wish I was there so I could see what is going on.

[Massageman]

You might check out the book, "Love Tactics"

You sound a lot like me, and if I had read this book 20 years ago, I'd be married with kids by now, I'm sure. At any rate, it explains what's going on in your relationship, and will cause you to take heart, as true friendship is the stuff that true love is made of. Keep in mind that, "friendship" means being able to think out loud in front of your "friend" without worry of what they will think about you. I have a very small handful of friends. The rest are aquaintances...

I've been in so many relationships, where I hear a girl say, "If someone did that for me, I'd be his," but then when it actually happens, they run. It's just human nature to want what we can't have.

[LucidDream]

Just thought I'ld let you know, I'm starting to fall for another friend. And I'm going to do something about it, 'cos I'm sure it's the best thing to do...
Won't be able to see her again till next year, and I'll probaly wait a bit after, but I'll ask her out, and I'll tell you what happens.
Hopefuly this will bring things upto a one-in-four success rate for this thread, rather than none-in-three.

Wish me luck.

[Nice Lover Boy]

Just thought I'ld let you know, I'm starting to fall for another friend. And I'm going to do something about it, 'cos I'm sure it's the best thing to do...
Won't be able to see her again till next year, and I'll probaly wait a bit after, but I'll ask her out, and I'll tell you what happens.
Hopefuly this will bring things upto a one-in-four success rate for this thread, rather than none-in-three.

Wish me luck.

Well, if things work out for you, then at least I know that there is hope out their again.