Divorce and Mixed Feelings

[kelly1685]

I have been married for 5 years and I feel like we have been going through a rough patch for at least 2 years now. My husband and I dated for one year and were planning on getting married and in the middle of planning a wedding I found out I was pregnant. SOO the first few years of our marriage and life together has been crazy but we've always made it work.

My husband and I had a great relationship in the beginning and now we have came to the point were the romance and affection is gone. Any conversation turns into a petty argument and it seems like everything is routine. I had been contemplating filing for divorce because no matter how hard both of us have been trying we go back to the routine actions and petty arguments. We have good times and bad. I know that marriage is hard work and everyone goes through rough patches, but now I'm questioning if I even love him anymore. I feel like my feelings have changed towards him.

I had a past relationship with another man a few years before I met my husband that I was completely head over heals about. We had dated on and off for several years and eventually somehow we both ended up going our on ways. From time to time we would randomly come across one another and have a quick catching up conversations and then it was back to our separate lives. He has always been in the back of my mind and I find myself often thinking about him. We never really had closure and I am wondering if this is why I still think about him (its been about 8 years).

So while trying to figure out if I am going to file for divorce, I find out that my ex is going through a divorce. I have not heard from him in years and then all the sudden we cross each others paths and do our normal catching up. Now that we both know each others situations we have had a few conversations through text. Innocent conversations about what he and I are both going through along with some encouragement of hoping for the best for each other.

Adding this to the mix has confused me so much more because I feel like I've never gotten over him. My thoughts of divorce from my husband do not steam from my ex but from our personal issues. Plus who's to say that we would even contact each other once decisions are made.

Any advice, help or similar situations?

[dontaskme]

I suggest you work out your issues with your husband first before even thinking of any remote possibilities between you and your ex.

Any relationship would go stale if you don't work hard to make it exciting.