Inlove with a guy who isn't inlove with me yet, though he says he has feelings

[VariousMatters]

I've been talking to this guy for almost a year now and it's been flirty and viby from the get go. We have also grown emotionally very close and it's no secret that we cross the friendship line. He stays 3 hours away from me so it makes things difficult but we talk every single day. He gets along with my parents, actually the whole family and we share values interests and a sense of humor.

I've fallen for him very hard and the thing is he started noticing it. He told me that he feels that I'm deeper in than he is, he says he owes it to me to be honest because he cares for me. When I asked him if he doesn't see any potential he replied by saying that he didn't say he has no feelings he is just saying that mine are further along. He said that his heart isn't ready to take the next step yet and he wants it to be and he's been trying so hard because everything is perfect.

I think he started doubting when I started seeking validation (in an indirect way that I didn't even notice) and now he says he doesn't want to hurt me,but I would rather get hurt than to never know? He says it might turn into everything or it might not go anywhere completely solid and he doesn't want me ever to feel blindsided.

Any thoughts on how to handle this?

[melancholia]

It sounds like he's stringing you along and he doesn't want a relationship with you. It shouldn't take a year for a man to figure out how he feels about a woman, so it may be time to bring up the conversation about exclusivity and having a relationship, or it might just be time to end things and move on.