That German bastard.

[Moonchild]

He's pissed me off for the last time.

So I swore off 'net dating and all after the last one, but I was stupid and did it again, and for the worst possible person, apparently. You know the type--likes the chase, meh for the rest.

Problem is, you can't tell the type who's after the chase 'til it's over and you've been dragged into it.

It was fine and happy at first, and we were annoying people on forums and stuff, and I thought I'd finally gotten over that girl I've been after for the past, what, 2-4 years? I've forgotten already, but it's more than 2 since it was high school... ah well, different story. So. We're having a blast, voice chatting lots, he swore a bit much for me but that's something I thought I could live with.

...aaaand then my dog starts chemo, and stuff starts to suck.

1. No matter who it is, if I can still IM but can't voice chat, I will not abandon my dying dog just to hear a voice I hear every night, but a few hours sooner.

2. I refuse to be serious about someone who says (even in jest) that he'll kill himself at 40 and therefore leave me single at 35.

3. I've known him for less than a month. I will not arrange for him to fly over here--even at his own expense--to meet me. I don't freaking trust him yet.

4. I refuse to say "I love you" if I don't mean it. I do not say "I love you" the moment I say "yes, I'll date you." Like is not love.

So he's all pissed off that I can no longer spend every waking moment talking to him (the dog needs someone with him 24/7, and we take shifts). And then I come to college, same time problem, but no voice chat at all anymore because I have to respect my roommates' noise preferences. And now he's accusing me of not being attracted to him, saying that I've lied to him, etc. Note that I still get on MSN to talk to him quite often regardless, and I have not lied to him. Problem: he's a forum admin on two forums I frequent.

So now I'm getting my affairs in order as dump-preparation, because it will effectively end my membership on those forums--that is, I suspect he'll ban me.

Also, I spent a weekend with the girl I was always after, and it only made me want to end this with the jerk more. She walked by me after showering, and I realized that wait, I was still attracted/in love. (She smelled wonderful.) Dammit. XD So now I have to get rid of him because it's not fair to him.

And I dunno, I may have gotten involved with him as an attempt to get over her in the first place.

So yeah. In addition to all this crap, please give me reasons I should never try to pull off long-distance ever again. I can use it for future reference.

The first one on my list:

:: Internet'ers can be creepy stalkers or obsessive, controlling bastards.

Next!

[ecojeanne]

'its not fair to him'!to be honest he sounds crazy...i reckon ur lucky u never actually met him in the flesh! its a little unfair to include 'german' in ur title...

[Moonchild]

'its not fair to him'!to be honest he sounds crazy...i reckon ur lucky u never actually met him in the flesh! its a little unfair to include 'german' in ur title...

XD; Sorry. I have to differentiate him somehow from the other six relationships I've been in. And it's how I describe him to my friends, since they remember he's in Germany but don't always remember his name.

I by no means intend to imply that all Germans are like this. After all, my ancestors got laid, otherwise I wouldn't be here.

[shh!]

Charlieboy says the Germans are the kinkiest people on the planet.

[doppelgaenger]

All I will say is never be too quick to judge or make generalized statements about such things.

[Gribble]

Sounds like a creep. Ditching him's probably the right call.

Besides, those damn sauerkraut eating pervs are all the same.

[doppelgaenger]

Besides, those damn sauerkraut eating pervs are all the same.

Hey but you're right, Germany is a big pool party full of sauerkraut eating pervs, with their rubber suits and their furries and French ticklers... and America is a closetful of fatass, inbred, redneck McDonalds eating homosexuals, transvestites, zoophiles, and necrophiliacs.

Oh, and I forgot about the ones that like to take a big steamy dump on their lover's chest... what are those called again?