absence makes the heart grow fonder....right?

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Ok...hey....I recently joined this site and I;ve been on it alot readin the advice and diff. stories and the opinions and adivce were VERY straight forward from some so I trust your judgement even though I dont know you Ok well here goes:

First and foremost, Im 17 and my bf is 18...young I know...anywho...

Well for Christmas break he went away to California for about 3 weeks. This wasnt the first time we've seperated in that way due to the fact that I've went away to Georgia myself. Well on to the point

Ever since he went to Cali, we've argued alot. But in my head, I've been wondering is being apart from each other a possible reason? I mean we argue about every stupid little thing, and its driving me crazy. I just wanted your input to know if there is a possibility that our constant fights could be because we miss being around each other. Btw I can take a bit of constructive criticism...but dont go too far to insulting me lol...I really sat and read some of your advice....you guys are harsh!lol...But I like straight forward....Thanks in advance!

[sticko]

Wow... This describes an exact problem I've been having with my gf... Do you guys talk on phone or AIM or txt or wat?
(just wondering)

My gf and i are 17. She went away to San Diego to stay with her mom for two weeks and we fight almost everyday... -__-
about dumb stuff too... Lol, funny you would post this.

[vashti]

You all are very young. The vast majority of relationships at this age are transitory. Being away from each other may give one or the other people involved some freedom they didn't realize they craved, and being reminded that it is only temporary may cause resentment, which would explain the constant bickering. OR, one person or the other may be insecure about their BF/GF traveling around without them, and may picks arguments because of that.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

First of all thanks Vashti, it could be true.Sicko, yes we do the msn messenger thing and talk on the phone when we get a chance to.

[sticko]

lol, you called me "sicko". Its Sticko haha. But thats cool I just wanted to maybe relate this advice to my own problems. lol

[vashti]

hehehe

I thought is was "sicko", too.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Lmao...sry for the typo ....Sticko*...there I fixed it lol

[alidile]

okay there's a number of options. as vashti said, you guys are young and perhaps being apart from one another gave another perspective. i'm NOT suggesting he cheated on you at all, but perhaps he was around different people, he realized you aren't the only fish in the sea. whenever i realize i'm no longer interested in someone i usually don't dump them right away because i haven't consciously realized it. perhaps he's realized that there's a lot more to life than just your relationship right now. have you addressed anything outright. i mean you ARE in a relationship already.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Well the thing is, we're very close. We've known each other for almost two years and we've only started dating last year (June will make a year of dating). I was the one who got a crush on other guys once upon a time, like when we get upset with one another and their's someone there to make me feel better in a loving way (I recently picked up a self esteem problem). But we've never had problems with him liking anyone else cuz Im his first girlfriend ever. I stopped the crush thing cuz I realized it wasnt a good thing to do even if we argued. I know we're very young, but I really feel like I love this guy. But at the same time, I wonder do I even know what love is.

[Mathias]

Well the thing is, we're very close. We've known each other for almost two years and we've only started dating last year (June will make a year of dating). I was the one who got a crush on other guys once upon a time, like when we get upset with one another and their's someone there to make me feel better in a loving way (I recently picked up a self esteem problem). But we've never had problems with him liking anyone else cuz Im his first girlfriend ever. I stopped the crush thing cuz I realized it wasnt a good thing to do even if we argued. I know we're very young, but I really feel like I love this guy. But at the same time, I wonder do I even know what love is.

You've got an incredibly mature mindset for your age. Kudos.

[Gigabitch]

Put that self-esteem problem right back down. It's not doing either of you any good.

Sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder, but more often, it makes the heart grow lonely. insecure, and short-tempered.

Some people need to be around each other to feel right, and being separated puts an enormous amount of stress on their relationship. Sounds like you and your bf are like this.

Call it a blip, maybe a lesson learned that separation doesn't work for you guys. It doesn't indicate that your relationship is going downhill.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Thanks to everyone for your advice! It was really needed and made me feel better. Oh, and thanks Mathias I try not to join the group of teenage girls who act as if they are extremely ignorant and bitchy

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

***Update***

Hey everyone.Well to update you guys he's back (yay lol) and things are better than ever. We went out to dinner last night for our 7 month anniversary and everything felt perfect...cant get my hopes too high though.We're expecting to take a summer vacation at my brother's house in georgia. Thanks for the advice!

[Junket]

7 month anniversary?

People celebrate that?

[Mathias]

7 month anniversary?

People celebrate that?

Some kids do, sure. It's kind of cute when you're 17.