Age difference, what are your views?

[Pixie]

Intersested to know from males and females on this one...

I'm in a relationship with a guy 9 years younger than me, he was 19 when we got toether, i was 28, i'm now 31 he's 22.
The controversial bit is that we worked together, and i was his boss (he's in a different job now)!
How would you guys and gals feel about that? if it was you?!!!

[whaywardj]

Which one of you am I supposed to imagine myself being? Him or you?

[Asip4u]

He's too young for you.

[Tone]

I, personally, wouldn't want to be involved with someone with more than a couple years difference of age. I don't know why it just kind of bothers me, but hey - you never know what life will throw at ya. And it's working for you and you are happy so that's what's important at the end of the day, I s'pose.

[Pixie]

Well look at it from an outsider point of view of you like, You think he''s too young for me!
Well we've been living together for ..well probably 2 and a half years. We get on well, i've always had more of a complex about the age difference than him, it doesn't seem to bother him at all.

[Tone]

Then as the saying goes, if it aint broke - don't try to fix it.

[Pixie]

I remember saying to a mate that i could never go out with anyone younger than me, and i really meant it when i said it. But when chemistry kicks in, believe me you stand no chance.
Weirdest thing here is that i've known his family practically all my life, his granmother and my mum are best mates, (they're not elderly though lol).His mum used to go drinking with my sister (10 years my senior) and my sister used to go out with his uncle. Wow this sounds weird when its written down! Eeek

[whaywardj]

You sure this story isn't about incest?

[Pixie]

I was worried it sounded like that....Definitely not blood or marriage relatives.... could have been if sisters had married his uncle. What would that have made us?....erm....2nd cousins or something, anyway lets not go there, it didn't happen....No incest can be laid at my door, thank god!

[MrDrum]

Well look at it from an outsider point of view of you like, You think he''s too young for me!
Well we've been living together for ..well probably 2 and a half years. We get on well, i've always had more of a complex about the age difference than him, it doesn't seem to bother him at all.

Of course not, hes banging an older woman. No guy cares. But honestly, there absolutly cannot be that much in common between you two. In general, females are more mature than males, and have more serious goals earlier on. A 22 year old guy is mentally and socially around where an 18 or 19 year old girl is.

The odds are, he will be looking elsewhere soon.

[AcidLacedKunt69]

as a leagle stand point age differnces do matter but as far ad a moral standpoint in my world it does not matter at all i dont think it would be the age that diffines the person but rather the maturity and use of knowlege
ive been with men over twice and my age...some of them worked...some of them didant

[boobaa]

2 years age difference is enough. At least now...

A 22 year old guy is somwhere where 19 - 18 y.o. girls are used...

18 is the end of childhood and lots of virgins want to finish with virginity if they didn't do it at the age of 16.

[confusedgirl]

I think that everyone is right with the mental age being of a 19 yr old girl but I also believe that every one is different and it depends on whether or not you see him being mature enough to be with you. If you do then there's no problem. Sometimes the younger person in the relationship can be quite mature and knowledgable but then again the older person can sometimes be the immature one. So there's no point asking us we don't know how mature you two are, it's whether or not you see him as being too immature for you.

[singularity2006]

I have my own issues I am trying to deal with concerning the difference between my gf and myself. She is 2 years older than I am, which by Asian standards is a no no. Asian standards dictate the girl must be at least 5 years younger. The rationale is as follows (there are several):

Girls age at a much more rapid clip than guys because of physical stress from hormones, child birth, and other physical factors. By age 35-40, the woman will look a great deal older than the guy ... so much so that there will not only be an age difference physically, but a mental difference will quickly evolve where the man will feel "inferior" and lose respect because he is no longer physically dominant in terms of seniority from that outside point of view. Shame follows and so does divorce or a lifetime of unhappiness. At least, that's what the slippery slope argument dictates. This is of course assuming either the guy or girl are shallow types or worry constantly about maintaining a proper public image. It's very tough to balance what you want personally and the image you want to show those around you.

Personally, I am ok with 2 years difference but I really think 9 is just too much, regardless of how you two feel. But when you're talking a difference where the girl is older by 1 or 2 years, I'm open for discussion.

[whaywardj]

Then as the saying goes, if it aint broke - don't try to fix it.

Pixie: I agree with the above post.