Caught her red-handed, what should i do?

[aidenalexander]

I'm in a serious relationship with a live-in gf for 10 months. She got sick for 2 months with ulcers and after I took her to a doctor she got better she left on a trip to KY to visit family. 5 days later, she told me she fell in love with another woman and dumped me. I was worried about her and after she admitted she was still in love with me, I flew her back. This may have been a mistake, but I am in love with her and was worried about her safety down there (she was hanging with extremely sketchy friends). My heart was broken and that was the way to fix it.

After she got back, I tried my best to make things work when she got back by rekindling the playful attitude we had when we first met, and taking her out on dates and to visit her family.

I found out she had been discussing breaking up with me before she even left for KY, and she left her facebook logged in...I saw that she had been telling some guy on facebook "and theres sumthin else i gota tell u he dont know but im leavin him as soon as my dad grabs my shiit. I'M A LESBIAN FULL BLOWN got a girlfriend in London Ky and im movin in over there next week." She had also told other friends she was moving in with her wife three days before she decided to break up with me officially.

In addition, she had been telling an ex bf that she was moving back in with him the day before she left for KY.

I confronted her about the ex bf and she said it was just a joke, that the ex bf had actually been his friend and it was nothing to worry about.

I was extremely suspicious and checked the phone IMs on the phone she was borrowing from me, and she had said to a friend "I need help I might have a date later lol...with sum1 who actually makes me smile from ear to ear :-)"

I had had enough and decided to confront her. She admitted the ex bf hadn't been a joke, that she had lied to me. She denied the text to a friend, saying that was an inside joke.

I was feeling extremely uneasy. The next day, I was taking a sh*t and she wanted to come in so she could "pack her phones" before we left so I could drop her off to visit her dad. I said "no you have to wait" and immediately went for her personal phone (the one she bought in KY)--what could she be hiding??

She had been talking to her ex gf in KY about leaving me and coming back to her, and to a guy she describes as her gay shopping buddy she said "hey text me on this phone he isn't able to see our messages. so tell me how you REALLY feel and don't hold back."

As soon as I came out of the bathroom she barged in and grabbed the phone, demanded that I had looked at it. I admitted of course I had, in my opinion she had already practically confessed she was hiding something on it by trying to interrupt my sh*t. I told her I couldn't trust her anymore and this wasn't working out for me. She yelled it wasn't working out for her either because I had no right to look at her personal phone.

I started driving her up to her dad's place, completely silent and totally mad. She said she still loves me, let's think about it this weekend if this relationship can be fixed. For some reason, I can't help but feel manipulated, like I have no control of my own relationship.

The part that pains me is that I'm still attracted to her and in love with her. What should my next move be? Should I try to work things out with her or move on with a broken heart?

[anon1986]

As hard as it will be for you, i honestly think your best option is to move on from her, i believe in the saying "once a cheat, always a cheat". If you love somebody, like the way she says she loves you then she should want to be with you and you alone.

There are plenty more fish in the sea, it seems to me like you have spent 10 months with a bad fish.

Keep your chin up and stay strong, you will find the right person for you and when you do you will look back at this relationship and understand why you had to let go.

[IncognitoSir]

Sounds mad trollish, but yeah, you're being used, have been being used and apparently like to be used. She's a liar, a cheater, and a manipulator. How much more time are you going to waste on such a useless person?

[HeartIsAching]

You've both got some serious issues.

She's a manipulative cheater, and you're controlling. Best off without her.

[amanda.m]

So she left you for another girl..then decided to try and make things right with you when she needed a way back home. Then she started talking to her ex...and then started asking some other guy how he felt about her? She definitely does not love you nor does she seem to care for your feelings at all. She's just using you and you will be better off without her.