What do people think ?

[confusionx]

Hi everyone first thread!

Ok Im 22 Male.

Im starting to believe that Im destin to be a single guy all my life.
I have a lot of negative influences on me when it comes to women / relationships. The vast majority of my older freinds are divorced or are just living with wifes for kids and row all the time and complain about there partners and think your a freak for always being single. Relationships just seem more hassle than there worth. Dont get me wrong I want a relationship but dont see the point of just having one for the sake of it. People say to me '' just go out with her, see what shes like'' I dont see the point of that because I can see where its going already. Im starting to put girls off now by being negative about the whole thing myself.

Can anyone relate to this ?

Is anyone out there (not in the honeymoon period) in a happy relationship ?

Why am I so bitter ?

Is it Un-natural to not want a relationship because your head is ruling your heart ?

[Moonchild]

You're twenty-two. You're not destined to be single for the rest of your life--heck, you're still in what most people take as the have-fun period. It's okay if you want to have interest in someone before asking them out, but yeah, negativity will be a problem. Waiting isn't bad, but thinking the worst is. Oh, and if your older friends think you're a "freak for always being single"... Well, they're not in the best of positions to be saying anything, are they? Makes me wonder if they're recruiting for the divorce club.

[BlueRaven]

I think I understand where you're coming from, and I've felt similar to that before. Correct me if I'm wrong, but you want the "right" girl to just show up, and you don't want to do any of the work to find her?

[confusionx]

No im not lazy, Ive never been lazy when it comes to somthing I want in fact Im driven but as I said is it worth the wait why not just give up now save the heartache.


Sorry freak insnt the right word and dont get me wrong they dont look at me with a funny look.

What I really wanted to get across is why do people have relationships ?......I know loads of people of various ages and situations. None of them are genuinly happy. Is it possible to avoid. why do people bother? why do I feel I need to repel women. The though of a relationship pi**es me off, a waste of time ... but I want one, a bit like a buying somthing you know you shouldent but cant help yourself. then think why did I get this.

Sorry cant think of how to put this!

[DarkDwarf]

Hi everyone first thread!

Ok Im 22 Male.

Im starting to believe that Im destin to be a single guy all my life.
I have a lot of negative influences on me when it comes to women / relationships. The vast majority of my older freinds are divorced or are just living with wifes for kids and row all the time and complain about there partners and think your a freak for always being single. Relationships just seem more hassle than there worth. Dont get me wrong I want a relationship but dont see the point of just having one for the sake of it. People say to me '' just go out with her, see what shes like'' I dont see the point of that because I can see where its going already. Im starting to put girls off now by being negative about the whole thing myself.

Can anyone relate to this ?

Is anyone out there (not in the honeymoon period) in a happy relationship ?

Why am I so bitter ?

Is it Un-natural to not want a relationship because your head is ruling your heart ?

*shudders at obvious grammar mistakes*

Regardless of your fairly shoddy grammar for one of twenty-two, I'm going to have to concur with Moonchild. Have some fun!

[DarkDwarf]

And on the question of, "What do people think?", I feel that question must be answered by each individual person, not one as a whole!

[confusionx]

Sorry I asked you don't understand. Also one is awfully sorry for one's poor grammar, didn't realised this was a English examination....Sir

[DarkDwarf]

No, I most certainly understand. I know what it is like to be in your situation with the feeling that there is no one at all right for you out there. Someone will come around, but you cannot force it. The only thing to do is have some fun. Also, sorry for yelling at your grammar. I'm simply fed up with people butchering the English language and getting away with it. I shouldn't be placing stress on your for events completely unrelated to you. My fault, my apologies.

[Mish]

Hey confusionx, you do what works for you

If you feel relationships are too much trouble than they are worth then they're probably are. If you feel like it never hurts to have this life experience then it probably isn't.

Deep down inside you know what works for you and what doesn't, so just follow your intuition

[BlueRaven]

No im not lazy, Ive never been lazy when it comes to somthing I want in fact Im driven but as I said is it worth the wait why not just give up now save the heartache.

I wasn't implying that you're lazy, I was just simply asking a queston. I never dated and never had any interest in dating until I met that one truly special girl, so I was trying to determine if you are feeling similar to the way I once was.

[Charlie Boy II]

If a relationship becomes unpleasant you end it. It's as simple as that, especially at your age. The alternative, spending your life alone, is a failry cheerless prospect.

[DoesntMatter]

I thought my uncle was going to be a single guy all his life.

But he got married at like 45.

So while we can all state the obvious that you will very likely change your mind at some point. But as for right now... Yeah, sometimes it feels good to be single and do whatever you want to, whenever! Especially if you like doing things your way.

Are you a really independent person? Strongly prefer to do things your own way?

[Michael6084]

dude, i wouldn't worry about being single or not right now. look for a career first and be as successful as you can in that career, or at least have your footing in it solidly first. then worry about being single or not.

[Mish]

If a relationship becomes unpleasant you end it. It's as simple as that, especially at your age. The alternative, spending your life alone, is a failry cheerless prospect.

I agree with that.

Although, it is entirely posible to likewise be in a relationship and at the same time spend your life alone in that joyless relationship.

[confusionx]

Ive been In employment since leaving school 7 and 1/2 years ago. After being fully qualified then took my qualifications on to a higher paid job as the senior technical person on site. Also Im now verging on being semi pro im my chosen hobby with serious sponsers backing me. So im not just drifting through collage and uni taking it easy like some do. Im totaly in control of my life and career.
Im not worried about finding someone, I know i could be in a relationship now. What Im worried about is that im starting to avoid them because there more hassle that there worth.

Thaks for the thoughts so far

...I know not everone goes to uni for a jolly!