The Difference Between Being Loved and Being Needed

[tracybelle]

Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years now. I was so sure we love each other so much and so last year I decided to quit from a job overseas and chose to put up a business with him. I thought then that working closely to each other would make our relationship stronger and better. But, lately I feel something is not so right. I know he still loves me as he still do a lot of things for me and takes care of me. He's there everytime I ask for him and answers when I call or sms. And that's my concern. I feel that he is seeing me because he knows I want to see him and not because he really wants to see me. Lately, I feel like am the one who always initiate things and making the first move, he responds though. Seems that he's just spending time with me so not to frustrate me and not because he wants time with me. I feel that he doesn't need me anymore. I already tried talking to him about how I feel but he accused me of being "needy." Am I?

[kitkitkitty]

you guys have been together for a long time, things are gona change at some point. maybe he feels that he doesn't need to txt you all the time but will reply anyway because he knows it means a lot to you. it doesn't mean he doesn't love you, it means he feels more settled that before and this would mean that he acts differently.

[Nea]

I think he does really still love you and want to be with you. My relationship sounds exactly like yours, I always text him and he will respond but not always. He doesn't push for me to come over anymore, and so on. I tried talking to him about it and he said he doesnt want to put on an act for me and pretend to be in that initial excitement stage. I think that he is just settling in and is comfortable with you and knows that he does not need to go out of his way to impress you or to keep you happy all the time.

That being said, I would still talk to him again, let him know this is something you need for your relationship to continue. I made the mistake of not talking about my problems and now I have started to become detached from my relationship and I do not know if it is going to last much longer.

[nerdy_guy]

At some point, relationships can become boring. Also, he might be so into the business that his attention has shifted. Especially if he invested a huge part of his money into it. Maybe he's just trying to keep it afloat so that he won't lose his investment. That, doesn't equate to him loving you any less though.