Can two complete opposites have a happy relationship together? Advice please(:

[Serah]

Hi all, my name's Serah. I'm new here and would just like some opinions and advice on my current situation, any comments would be greatly appreciated.

So here's the situation: I'm an 18 year old girl, quite reserved/introverted, never been drunk, non-smoker, don't go to parties often, but I play guitar and I like really heavy music - this is pretty much how I met this guy. He's loud, outgoing, knows everyone, goes out drinking all the time and smokes. He's genuinely a really nice guy but he tends to talk a LOT, whereas I'm usually quiet in social situations. Somehow it works, though the conversations can be largely one-sided.

Now, we dated for about a month just over a year ago. This was back when he didn't smoke and didn't drink much. We ended it after 2 weeks because we stopped spending time together and he spent more time with his friends. It wasn't a messy break-up but we hadn't spoken since.

Recently he's started to talk to me again through texts and the internet, and things are going well. My main concern is how much he's changed (smoking, drinking, etc) and how we're complete opposites, even more so than before. Could this work?

Non-smokers: is it possible to have a happy relationship with someone who smokes, say, a packet a day? I really can't stand the smell... but I really like this guy and I think he really likes me too. I really want it to work this time. :/

Thanks,
- Serah

[Superfantastich]

If you have handle the smokers breath... yuck, and by the sounds of his talking habit he will be breathing on you alot
But seriously if he really likes you I am sure he will be willing to meet you halfway in this.

[Serah]

Heheh, good point... I didn't really think of that, yuck it's just frustrating because he never used to smoke at all, he was really opposed to it. Then all of a sudden he's decided to start because his friends are doing it. Apart from that he's great(:

[Superfantastich]

Well good luck, hope it works out well for the both of you

[Serah]

Thanks (: just went out with him tonight and things were awesome. He only smoked like once or twice and I didn't really notice it as much as I thought I would. I'd draw the line at kissing him right after a cigarette though, yuck. Haha thanks again.

- Serah

[Ric]

You can have fun with him. You can calm him down a bit while he can get you more out of your shell so you experience life more. =]

[Regnent]

My wife and I are fairly opposite.
You do need some (major) things that you are compatible on.

Otherwise, most smokers arn't too bad about compromising, you can smoke, but please do it outside. Etc.

[Sunnybeach7]

I would not be happy with a smoker, and would not go into a relationship with someone who smokes...but that is just me, perhaps you can be more tolerate of it than I?
Things to consider... can you live your home, your clothes, your husband, your kids all smelling of cigarettes if it ended up being a long-term permanent relationship? Not to mention that kissing him will taste like an ash tray...breath mints or not.

Aside from the other couple of things you mentioned, I'm not sure what makes you so opposite, but if you like each other and you get along, and you can live with the things you don't like about him, I don't see a problem.

[doppelgaenger]

Well, I'm an introvert in a relationship with someone I'd consider an extrovert. So I'd say it can work out. We're pretty happy with each other - it's just she likes to go out and hang with her friends pretty often, and I'm happy that she does because I need time to myself. Works out great!

Smoker's breath really isn't that bad, IMO, but I'm glad my GF decided to quit smoking (completely on her own). She has been really considerate in the past, and she'd chew gum or have a few mints before she kissed me, and she always went outside.

[xxazurexx]

I'm introvert, my ex hubby was an extrovert.

I found that the qualities he possessed that had first attracted me in the beginning, resulted and further down the line in being the qualities that we'd clash over.