Religion

[random1]

Hey, im just wondering if you guys think that religion can play a big part of a relationship? "big part" as in you are willing to sacrifice a relationship because your gf isnt a christian...

[anachronistic]

bwahahahahahahaha!

well i guess it *can* but it shouldn't.

[vashti]

Obviously this happens a lot, and even though it is politically correct to say that religion shouldn't come between people, in actual practice I think it DOES matter. The best kinds of relationships are between people with shared values.

I should stress that in absolutely no way do I find Christian values superior to non-Christian values. It's just in many ways I find Christians incompatible with non-Christians.

[anachronistic]

i have my unitarian beliefs and my lover has this weird christian orthodox thing going on. although the relationship is only a few weeks old, it really doesn't play a big part in the relationship.

[LoveTwist]

Really all depends how religious or anti-religious the people involved are. Verging on the atheist side as I do, I don't think I could go out with anyone who was seriously religious, I'd be too worried about offending them more than anything. But I guess if they were only vaguely religious then it wouldn't matter.

All depends on the people involved. Because some people take their religion very seriously and some people can't take religion seriously at all, and obviously those 2 completely opposite types of people are unlikely to get along.

Same goes for people that are very religious but have different religions. Chances are they would end up disagreeing on too many issues and see things in very different ways. Especially if they had children, because they would be all the rows about which religion the child should be brought up with, and in many cases it couldn't be both, because they'd be too many conflicts and differences in beliefs.

[bluesummer]

I dated a guy who was a diiferent religion than me, for three years. Actually, I'm not religious at all myself. It didn't affect us at all, the religious stuff anyway.....I respected his beliefs, I accompanied him to a few functions. He knew I didn't believe what he did and would never convert......as long as the base morals are similar, I think its fine. It also depends how *hardcore* religious each person is.

[Junket]

as long as the base morals are similar, I think its fine.

I agree with this.

My girlfriend is a "born again" Christian, and fairly conservative as she's from a small town in Texas. Thing is though, her ideals in how the church and Christianity should be, greatly differ from what it is. In fact alot of what she doesn't like about many churches, and divisions of Christianity are the same things that turned me away from Catholicism/Christian beliefs long ago.

Difference is that she's still trying to find her place, if not create it, while I've pretty much given up on it.

But the point is that we agree on many of the same values, regardless as to why or through what.

[vashti]

Maybe dating is one thing. Being married and raising a family is another. My husband was a different religion than me when we dated and got married. It was never a problem until we had kids.

[Glyph]

Someone walks up to me on the street and tells me that someone watches everything I do, hears everything I think, can look at my emotions and judge my worth as a person, and that if I don't live by this person's code of ethics, I will be banished to a fiery pit for all eternity. I ask who this person is, and all I get in return is that I can't see him, but he works in mysterious ways though there is no empirical evidence of his existence.

Would YOU date this person? If so, you're just as crazy.

Being mentally stable, I only date those who are mentally stable.

[bluesummer]

Someone walks up to me on the street and tells me that someone watches everything I do, hears everything I think, can look at my emotions and judge my worth as a person, and that if I don't live by this person's code of ethics, I will be banished to a fiery pit for all eternity. I ask who this person is, and all I get in return is that I can't see him, but he works in mysterious ways though there is no empirical evidence of his existence.

Would YOU date this person? If so, you're just as crazy.

Being mentally stable, I only date those who are mentally stable.

Wow, I don't think anyone could put it better than this.

[Gribble]

I find that most Christians are little different than myself. Christmas and Easter they get weird, and most haven't read the Bible as extensively as I have, but that's about the extent of it. So I usually get along just fine.

[LoveTwist]

I knew an atheist and a pretty hard core Christian who were going out when I was at Uni. Pretty much all they did was argue. It was so strange because in many ways they couldn't have had more different beliefs about the world and life. But they still had great fun being together because they both seemed to love arguing so much.

It was crazy really. A few times they'd fall out, usually because the religious one would get offended. Most of the time they'd sit and have long debates and question each other’s beliefs. The atheist would laugh because the Christian beliefs, like that you only got to Heaven if you worship God would seem so alien, and the Christian would laugh because the other didn't get it and was going to hell. Call me crazy but I just don’t get how people which such fundamentally different views could be in a relationship. How can you when you think each other’s view of the world was so utterly wrong, and not only that but constantly make fun of the others beliefs? I know it happens, but I don’t get it.

Boggles the mind.

But yeah, if neither of you is seriously religious, or out to insult the others religion or convert them and your morals are essentially the same, then that shouldn't be a problem.

[Daft Punk]

rofl. Opposites attract.

I too have this "problem" I have my own ideas aside from conventional christainity and my GF is sort of an agnostic. My parents don't really like that I have decided to date outside of our "religion" but...tough. Mel and I do share different views but we kind of just disscuss them....we hardly ever have an aggresive arguement.

Just don't make converting her a big deal...if she is comfortable in what she belives.

[vashti]

Well, I guess I can't blame your parents... You don't say how old you are, but if you are anywhere near the age where you MIGHT be marrying someone, they are naturally gonna worry about you making babies that will be banished to Hell. Who wants to make an emotional investment in someone going to Hell?

**disclaimer: this post does not represent my personal views about God.**

[Chimeros0]

I just laugh at all the controversy that religion causes.
Someone always has to be right & the other person always has to be wrong.
As if there aren't any other colors in the world.
As if we can't just respect one another for our differences.