my girlfriend went down on another girl

[d-l]

ive been with this girl for just over a year and am madly in love, and so is she, about two weeks ago she started getting upset, she wanted to take a break, not because she didn't love me she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me, it was beacuse we are only 17 and she wanted to eperience different things, she came over the other night and we discused it, we decided (she decided) that we will have a break for one month then get back together, it seem to bad untill she left the next morning and i started thinking, i wouldn't no if i could get back with her after she had done things with other guys, she ended up ringing me that night and saying she didn't want a break for one month, so we talked for a wile we decided that we wouldn't see each other for the rest of the holidays and this would be our break, she said she wasnt going to be with other guys on this break, anyway two nights later i rang her we talked for a while and then she told me she went to a party last night with her friends she then told me that a girl came up to her and kissed her then about 10 mins later there were five f then in bed playing around (nothing ot heavy) then she left, and sarted getting with another girl that ended up on a matress and my girlfriend went down on this girl, she said to me on the phone that she wants to get back together now and that she had got the girl on girl thing out of her system, i dont mind that she did this to much its not like im grossed out by it.
i dont no what to do, any help would be great.
regards.

[COAD]

Basically, the girl cheated on you with another girl.....


Not much i can say

[eugene]

I wouldn't know (you can read my post), I really have no right to give advice. I'll just give an opinion.

She's human, and you're human. Picture yourself this, you guys are in love, stay togther for years, get married even... everything is great, perfect, but then you start feeling that you missed out on something because you have only been with only this one girl all your life. You might even cheat... even if you just KNOW that you are not that kind of person.

I say if things are going that well but you are just 17 it might be smart to try stuff while on a break, so not to be tempted later.

But on the other hand thats a slippery road...

[mhussain]

hi d-l ,

i dont understand the concept of 'on a break' but i am told that it makes sense.....

if it means that u too dont love each other and that if u dont find someone else .. u will come back together than u shouldnt mind ...

but if it means anything else which involves that she loves you and that u love her .... than dude .. she cheated on you , with whom doesnt matter ..

the only reason why u arent grossed out is because she did it with another woman and in the heart of ur hearts u know that the chances of them going out are on the left side of the number line ....

whatever u do ....

just replace the other girl with a guy

than search ur feelings

Hussain

[bluesummer]

I agree with above post.

Think about if she had given head to a GUY. Tha would probably upset you a lot more right? So I don't get it, you say you don't know if you could get back with her if she did things with other GUYS, but because it was GIRLS its ok? Hm.

[eugene]

I agree with above post.

Think about if she had given head to a GUY. Tha would probably upset you a lot more right? So I don't get it, you say you don't know if you could get back with her if she did things with other GUYS, but because it was GIRLS its ok? Hm.

Its because deep deep down we hope for a threesome, it cant be helped we are guys. So a girl cheating with another girl is more easy to forgive. And if they decided not to see other people how is it cheating?

[bluesummer]

Hm. I asked my bf what he thought about this theory. He said if I ever touched anyone else sexually, guy or girl, he would end our relationship.

And think about it....you don't expect when you go on a one month 'break' that the ther person is gonna run right out and start experimenting sexually with other people, then expect to get back with you afterwards and have this bogus 'loving' relationship. It's just bullshit. So what if it's not cheating, its still showing that there's a big lack of maturity in understanding what a committed, respectful relationship entails.

[eugene]

True. But its hard to really commit at 17, from what I understand of what he said things were going too well too fast and she couldnt handle it. What I am sure off that its really almost impossible to end up with the first person you love unless youve been with other people. I wouldnt do it however.

The perfect thing IMHO is if they were to breakup and date other people for a few years, grow up and realize they made a mistake and get back togther for good. True love wins.

[Only-virgins]

Tempted later tempted now..same thing. If you break and she goes with someone else ...well..to me it makes no difference between that and her sleeping with someone else during your marriage.

[mhussain]

u see when u say the word "cheating" there is no distinction betweeen whether it was with a woman or a man ... it is plain simple cheating ....

it is hard to commit at 17 ... maybe it is .. does that automatically imply that is easier to cheat


Hussain

[shenmue]

has she been checked for vd's?

[Illusional]

personally i wouldn't worry. it just sucks that you'll never have a threesome.

raverboy

[shh!]

The perfect thing IMHO is if they were to breakup and date other people for a few years, grow up and realize they made a mistake and get back togther for good. True love wins.

I am going with this guy. It isn't good when someoneone says they need a break - it's similar to married people being "separated". It is usually the first step towards divorce.

And yes, girl/girl sex is cheating. The only difference is that now she sees you will tolerate it.

[misombra]

why are people trying to have serious, committed relationships at 17? i don't think one can expect anybody to be faithful to one person at that age. if you don't like it then break up with her. i'm sure she'll do it again. start treating you like total shit, ask for a break, go down on whoever else she feels like doing it with, and then use you as her auxillary back up plan.

[shh!]

why are people trying to have serious, committed relationships at 17? i don't think one can expect anybody to be faithful to one person at that age. if you don't like it then break up with her. i'm sure she'll do it again. start treating you like total shit, ask for a break, go down on whoever else she feels like doing it with, and then use you as her auxillary back up plan.

Well said. I was trying to articulate this point, but it is so early - I haven't finished my coffee yet - that what I wrote made absolutely no sense, so I just deleted it.

:-)