backwards situation

[annoyed23]

My man and I have a 5 month old daughter, and I work and he stays home to watch her…He watches her 3 days a week…and that’s it. No part time job, no nothing, and when I am home, I take complete care of our daughter to spend time with her. I clean the house, I get her ready in the mornings, I am the only one that drives, I am the one that pays the bills, I am the one that cooks…etc. I had to work from home yesterday due to the weather, and he expected that just because I was home, that he could sleep and play video games all day…and I would take care of our daughter and pull an 8 hour work day. How does he not see that I am exhausted? How can he feel like its okay for me to have to deal with everything? I don’t know whats going on in his mind. We had a fight and I asked him what he needs from me as his girlfriend, and his response was “nothing” and then he proceeded to play video games...and I asked him to stop and talk to me…and I told him I over reacted about some stuff (which was true) and all of a sudden everything was fixed. But I support his ass…how can he turn around and say that when I bust my ass to make sure he is happy all the time, and has everything he wants???? I told him that I feel like I am pushing him away and his response to that was “no, not really”. I am so confused. I realize our daughter comes first, but I have been pushing so hard to keep our relationship the way it was (both physically and emotionally) regardless of how tired I am…so that he would be happy. I don’t get it.

[Indignant]

i'd rather have a cheating hardworking hisband then a worthless piece of shit like that. and you were fighting for him and over him?

[Gigabitch]

I don't get it either, and by "it", I mean how the **** you can spend your time and energy on this guy who knocked up somebody else just four months after knocking you up. The guy has no job and no respect.

Please, please, please tell me WHY the **** you're with him in the first place? Just because he's your babydaddy?

[annoyed23]

I love this man, and he wasnt always like this. he used to work very hard, and he knocked up the other chick thinking we were done. he was not aware of my pregnancy...so that whole thing is just a big eff up. we all know that...but I am not with him just because hes my baby daddy...I am not afraid of being alone, or taking care of our daughter on my own...it feels like I already am.

[Gigabitch]

Yes, you ARE, and taking care of him as well. It really pisses me off that he was out running around having unprotected sex so much, and that he found women that were willing to go for it. WTF? It is amazing to me that he has not one, but TWO infants and he's unemployed.

You might love him but I don't, so send him on over here and I'll shake him until his eyes rattle, then kick his ass and make him get a job.

[annoyed23]

him and I were engaged, and we were trying for a baby...so our daughter was planned. the other female was his ex gf that was still trying to get with him...and clearly she wanted a baby cuz she asked him for one. he is unemployed not by choice...he had a good job...they laid him off. he has tried repeatedly to get another job...but he isnt trying hard enough.

[Indignant]

this is one big lie, you are lying to yourself and your child.

he could spend that amount of energy that he wastes on video games, on jobhunting instead. but you let him abuse your family.

now i am not the one to dislike video games, however there is a right time for it.

[annoyed23]

Indignant - you are not aware of the entire situation, you dont know all the itty bitty details. was it not you who told me not to lose respect for someone until i know the whole story inside and out from both parties? you are only seeing my side. you dont see his, or this other females...so how can you say im lying to my child? why would i do that to such a pure, innocent little girl?

[Indignant]

Indignant - you are not aware of the entire situation, you dont know all the itty bitty details. was it not you who told me not to lose respect for someone until i know the whole story inside and out from both parties? you are only seeing my side. you dont see his, or this other females...so how can you say im lying to my child? why would i do that to such a pure, innocent little girl?

of course i am only able to base my opinion on the amount of the information that you provide me with. if you truly want an advice then you have to be more specific and detailed.

[Gigabitch]

Well, I hope he can step up and do what needs to be done, here. Playing video games all day is what you do when you're free and have nothing better to do. Sitting on his ass and letting you do everything is just plain insulting.

****, I used to have a drag-ass husband, but at least he had some cash. He used to play video games all day but he paid the bills.

[Indignant]

Well, I hope he can step up and do what needs to be done, here. Playing video games all day is what you do when you're free and have nothing better to do. Sitting on his ass and letting you do everything is just plain insulting.

****, I used to have a drag-ass husband, but at least he had some cash. He used to play video games all day but he paid the bills.

if he was my partner i'd probably beat the shit out of him and tell him it's for the best.

[emily]

NO - Wait and think.. If you say he had a job and he was laid off..
To be honest its not easy to get a job now a days. There are many people who try really hard but they dont get a call.. Its not that only an interview call can prove that he has tried hard for it.. I have many people who have tried 6 months everyday and never recieved any call.
I totally understand how you feel. Its not easy. But i think all you need to do is write to him.. Express in writing.. Do not put him down.. but ask for his support.. Ask him if he will be with you forever ? Tell him that you feel tired and cannot do without his support.
Once you start writing make sure you do nt say anything to hurt his ego..If i was you i would have done this.. Before listening to anyone in the world.. The people commented above has got nothing to do with your life...You need to take control..You need to think whats imp.. its your life and your baby's and he is a part of your family aswell- So lets not forget that.
All the best!! Hope everything goes well. Just pray to god to give you some more strength.

[Lite]

if he was my partner i'd probably beat the shit out of him and tell him it's for the best.

Here you go again threatening violence on people. What would your response be if they actually hit you back I wonder...

I know someone right now who lost a good paying job. They've been out of work for a year, have applied everywhere including Target, and now they're losing their house. They're pretty damn depressed because they've applied for everything, even for a job administering unemployment benefits.

This week alone over 100,000 more jobs have been eliminated in the US. What about the family in LA that just committed suicide 2 days ago? Time are very rough in many segments of the job market, and getting worse daily.

I don't get the guy's other behaviors, and adding it all up he sounds like a loser. However she hasn't stated at all how hard he is or is not looking for a new job. I can spend an hour a day applying for jobs, and the rest of the day doing household chores and playing video games while I wait for calls to come in. Was I not trying hard enough during the 2 months I spent unemployed last year? I applied for an average of 7 jobs per day, and talked to 4+ recruiters per day. That was before the economy really went south.

[Indignant]

Here you go again threatening violence on people. What would your response be if they actually hit you back I wonder...

I know someone right now who lost a good paying job. They've been out of work for a year, have applied everywhere including Target, and now they're losing their house. They're pretty damn depressed because they've applied for everything, even for a job administering unemployment benefits.

Lite, please quit being idealistic. yes, some good men do lose jobs everyday. what makes them good is not sitting around the house playing games but actually being involved with their families. helping with kids, around the house. such is not a case as described by the annoyed.

[Lite]

Lite, please quit being idealistic. yes, some good men do lose jobs everyday. what makes them good is not sitting around the house playing games but actually being involved with their families. helping with kids, around the house. such is not a case as described by the annoyed.

Apparently you missed the part later where I said the rest of it adds up to him sounding like a loser.

As for being idealistic, what's wrong with it? Could you explain to me what is wrong with expecting people to be responsible for their crap, and then holding them to it?