I am in love with the married woman

[loveheart]

We actually work together and I have seen her around, but we never talked. Some time ago we ended up working next to each other, our desks like side by side. She started talking to me first, I know she likes me little bit more than just friend, she told me that herself. Now we got kind of close and we talk about everything, our families, live, relationships, just everything. We laugh, we talk, and we even had our first fight. I am crazy about this woman; I have never felt like this about anybody. She told me about her marriage. She does not love her husband, but she used to her life. They also have a 8 years old kid. She says she does not care what her husband does. I think they are basically just roommates. She said that she likes me and I told that I love her. She is really does not trust me fully yet, and she is afraid of changes, she watches movies like ‘Unfaithful’ and other ones like that, and it puts all kind of thoughts into her head. I do not know what to do, I really care for this woman and I want to be with her.
One day after work I was walking her to her car and I sad how I care for her and do anything for her, and that she can trust me because I have no intentions to lie to her or hurt her in any way. As she was getting in the car, she sad, “You break my heart, you gone”. I really do not know what to do, this woman is my everything.

[confused01]

i think in my opinion it's normal for her to be scared from changes,because when a relationship strats it's uasually great and wonderfull once you start living together it becomes more boring and guys they change a lot, i don't know why, and we want the same usual habits before marriage or before living together, we hate change because you guys change to the worse not to the best, and in my case i couldn't get used to it, i lived with my ex for3years it was all just waiting for that day when he will change to what he used to. she has the right to not trust you 100%, specialy that i assue her husband is a cheater, since they are just roommates, and they don't care but women care a lot even if we try not to , usually we do, so she doesn't want to fall in love again, and experience the same situation.
what to do is be yourself fro now, show her who you really are, don't do something just to get her, she needs someone honest with her in everything.
be yourself around her . if she likes it god for both of you if not you won't have to break her heart or yours

[NeoSeminole]

ha ha, what do you mean "we" change for the worst? It seems to me like every relationship the woman loses interests in sex and becomes fatter.

[vashti]

ha ha, what do you mean "we" change for the worst? It seems to me like every relationship the woman loses interests in sex and becomes fatter.

OP - Since this woman has a child with this man, I think you should back off. Your love for this woman can wreck a child's life, and that being the case, there will be no happy ending for you, even if she DOES leave her husband for you. Besides, she will have an awfully hard time reconciling whatever marital difficulties she is having with her husband with YOU hanging around in the shadows.

We can't always get what we want.

[pinkpuca84]

yea...i agree...my cousin is inlove with a married man too...Gosh...talking about how much trouble she made to herself AND our family! in the end the guy didnt wanna leave his wife and kid. she now keeps on telling me how much she regreted it. so she should! we kept on telling her like millions times that it wasnt a good idea. wanna go on to the same road as her? ur choice, dude

[xd3vilx]

wad i can tell you is...there is less a percent that you will ever touch her heart...you should give up and maybe just be a good friend to her...

[hopelesromantic]

I totally understand where you are coming from. I’ve been in a similar situation.
I was in love with a woman who I worked with. From what I "understood" she was unhappy in her marriage.

Like the two of you, she and I talked about everything. We spent time together and meeting secretly. At the end of our meetings she always went back to him.

I know it's an amazing feeling you have when you see her; when you think about her, and the fantastic rush when you’re around her.

Her trust issues are normal. All of us find change hard, and being able to trust someone else with your hart is a big step to take.

You need to sit down and find out how she really feels and what her intentions are. It’s important that you are sure in your mind that you’re prepared to be in a relationship with this woman and her daughter.

You’ve obviously invested a lot emotionally into this relationship and it’s important that you’re prepared for the situation where things don’t go the way you want them to.


I hope this helps
HR