I am loss with out her

[jclub]

Dear All,

I would like anyone can provide me some suggestions or comments. I just broke up with my girl friend about 2 weeks ago. We dated for only about 1 month. Our relationship was very healthy, until I told her something that she could not accept the fact and continue on with the relationship.

I haven't betrayed her or did anything to harm her. I was just being honest about the work that I do. She could not accept the work that I do (No I am not a hitman). I just do what needs to be done to bring food and shelter to my family.

She is a very innoncent person and she cannot accept that. In her world all she see is bad is bad and good is good. There is no in between, which I am in the one that is in between. Her life experience is all so far been just good influences. So for her to accept someone that is in between is quite hard or could not be accepted by her.

I really loved her. Now she wouldn't answer my call or message. I don't know how else to go on. As I seem to have lost of direction since she left me.

Appreciated any suggestions or comments anyone can provide.

J.

[Lipp]

So, what is your job? Not a hitman, okay, but there's a world of difference between a pimp keeping a dozen of his girls doped up all day and someone who sells fake DVDs at a streetcorner.

[Charlie Boy II]

yeah, what's the job?

[ecojeanne]

are you in some organised crime or somethin? my ex used to say he was mixed up in chinese organised crime...he lied a lot so i never actually believed him....living in a fantasy! how bad can your job be?

[psydex]

more info required really....

[starbuck]

If he's doing something illegal, he's probably not going to tell us. OP, maybe she's worried about going out with someone that might land you in jail or even her for that matter? This may not only be a moral issue for her but also one of personal safety.

Honestly, if I were dating someone and I found out he did or wanted to do something illegal for work, I would dump him IMMEDIATELY. And it's not necessarily about values and morals either. Although I do care about having someone whose values match mine, I also wouldn't want to see someone I love go to jail, incur hefty legal fines, or have their dicey behavior compromise my safety.

I'm not talking about the occasional illegal thing. If he wants to toke up once in a blue moon or do mushrooms once in a while, I am tempted to say I'd be ok with that as long as it was every once in a while. Although after dating my pot-addicted ex, even that stuff would give me pause. I'm talking about stuff that would get you or her in SERIOUS trouble.

It's actually hard to give you advice on this matter without knowing what it is that you actually do. All we can do is make assumptions. I'm sort of assuming it's drug dealing for some reason.

[starbuck]

I also want to add that you say you "do what needs to be done to bring food and shelter to your family," but what you do for work is many times a choice not a need.

Are there any other paths you could choose where you could still support your family and not be doing something illegal? You'll be hurting your family more in the long run if you end up in jail.

EDIT: Actually, I shouldn't say it's always a choice because there are definitely people out there who do illegal things because they're forced to, especially in other countries. I'm not trying to be insensitive to people in desperate situations. Had to correct myself on that.

[Arrow]

If he's doing something illegal, he's probably not going to tell us. OP, maybe she's worried about going out with someone that might land you in jail or even her for that matter? This may not only be a moral issue for her but also one of personal safety.

Honestly, if I were dating someone and I found out he did or wanted to do something illegal for work, I would dump him IMMEDIATELY. And it's not necessarily about values and morals either. Although I do care about having someone whose values match mine, I also wouldn't want to see someone I love go to jail, incur hefty legal fines, or have their dicey behavior compromise my safety.

I'm not talking about the occasional illegal thing. If he wants to toke up once in a blue moon or do mushrooms once in a while, I am tempted to say I'd be ok with that as long as it was every once in a while. Although after dating my pot-addicted ex, even that stuff would give me pause. I'm talking about stuff that would get you or her in SERIOUS trouble.

It's actually hard to give you advice on this matter without knowing what it is that you actually do. All we can do is make assumptions. I'm sort of assuming it's drug dealing for some reason.

I believe he could tell us even in a public forum, since I know of a forum in which a registered member is a transexual who prostitutes himself AND is known in the sex industry in my country. Besides it's really hard to track down forum users because you can never be sure that they provided the board with true info and they could be accessing the forums from virtually anywhere.

That being said, the OP probably steals for a living, or deals drugs which is actually quite common for young people since there's high demand in parties.

Now starbuck, one of my old crushes dates a criminal and probably doesn't know about it (or knows only a colourful version of the facts)... If you had a word with her I'd be grateful.

[Charlie Boy II]

the man gots to get paid. He working to make his paper bigger. An' that's just bein' real dog. The streets is a jungle.

[Charlie Boy II]

Because he taking care of his business, biatch.

[starbuck]

Think the pimp will ever come back and tell us?

[Charlie Boy II]

Maybe once he gets down laying out his shorties.

[shh!]

I think he robs banks.

[Petit Papillon]

I think he's a stripper oorrr he's playing in pornos
If it's true, I wouldn't date such a guy either

[bluesummer]

Regardless of what he does, they were dating a MONTH. One month is a relatively short time, and if I found out a guy I'd been dating for a month did things I was completely against, he'd be out. No regrets.