devastated...

[martin12]

this is my first post. so i guess ill tell you the whole story.

i have been with this girl for 2 years. for the first year, we were together everyday...for the whole day. we were best friends. i liked her a lot but i never had enough courage to make a move. eventually she met another guy, one of my good friends. she asked me if it was ok if she "talked" to this guy. i said it was ok and they eventually dated. however i wasnt ok... because i liked this girl a lot.

now keep in mind i still hung out with her everyday...even while they were dating. this caused problems and they eventually broke up. i took advantage of the situation and made my move.

we date for months but she texts the other guy right in front of me. i hinted to her to stop and sometimes even told her to stop but it never seemed to click to her. eventually she cheated on me with him. i break up with her and hook up with another girl to piss her off. when we fought about it she would put the blame on me. she said that the only reason she cheated on me was because she was afraid i was going to cheat on her first (which i had no intention of doing.) this devastated me. while we were together i had not talked to a single girl. i had been completely loyal to her. she was the sketchy one who would text other guys.

weeks pass and we do not speak but we finally talk and decide to hang out as friends.

this is when i fall in love. we are dating again and everything is so perfect. she is not texting anyone and she seems very loyal and dedicated to me. this is my first "love." later i catch her texting him again and confront her. she says shes sorry and that its too hard to just ignore him. (i guess he tries to talk to her all the time) this is when everything goes bad. the sex stops and i notice the relationship dying. i give it some time but it gets worse. she is talking to him again and i find out that she went to the library to study with him.

i cant take this anymore. i break up with her but she says she just needs a break from everything. her excuse is that she is in college and she works almost everyday and has no time to see her family and friends and to have a boyfriend. well i guess i believe it... i think this is my problem. i want to let go but i cant. she treats me like shit but i cant seem to let it go. everytime i confront her about something she always turns it around and puts the blame on me somehow which i think is very immature.

during our "break" she is very distant. she says she loves me but i cant really believe her. she doesnt text me as much as she used to and she will only see me for a couple hours every once in a while.

what am i supposed to do? im completely shattered. do i need to let her go? much help needed...

[kitty001]

She doesn't love you if she was willing to cheat on you with this guy. She doesn't love you if she's so busy with everything else that there's no time left for you. People always make time for things they care about.
Do you really want to waste your time waiting for someone who doesn't want to be with you? I think you know that you need to let her go.

[NeoSeminole]

OP, you are a pussy and she's immature. My advice: grow a pair and let her go.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

They are both immature actually. Cheating on one another cuz you figure the other one is going to do it or because the other one did do it? You expect that to work for real? You both need to grow up mentally. You're both at fault for why the relationship isnt working. I personally dont see you guys' relationship working again, so I'd just let go. Its hard? Well cut all contact with this chick. Continuing this is only going to drag you into doing it all over again.

[NeoSeminole]

LadieNisha4u2nv, where did the OP say he cheated? He broke up with his ex before he hooked up with another girl. This is perfectly fine since he was no longer dating her. I disagree about him being at fault for their relationship failing. It sounds like his immature, bitchy ex doesn't know what she wants.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

I guess I scanned over that breaking up part,but even though its not cheating, he did it to spite her. Its still stupid.

[martin12]

i agree...it was a stupid move however i was drunk and very angry. but i gave her a second chance and things turned out great. now i just dont know what to do anymore...