Falling for someone I shouldnt be falling for.

[excowho]

I'll keep this as short as possible.
So about 2 and half years ago now, I met an amazing girl.
And instantly we were good friends. We hung out and talked a lot and it was awesome.
And for those like 2 years she was like a sister to me, I never really had feelings for her. About 1 year ago now she got a boyfriend, who is an awesome guy and a friend. And I would never want to do anything to hurt either of them or their relationship. But recently we've been hanging out a lot and out of no where these feelings just showed up. I've never felt anything like what I feel for her now.
I've got to lose these feelings for her, but I don't know how. And in a way it sucks a lot, but I know its what needs to be done.
Any suggestions or similar experiences?

Thanks guys.

UPDATE, Go to last post

[shh!]

If he's your friend, I suggest you cut contact with her for a while till your feelings diminish.

[starbuck]

Agree. And if you hang out with her, hang out with both of them, not just her alone.

[excowho]

Thanks for the quick responses.

And although I do agree I need to spend time away from her and get her off my mind. I'm not sure how to go about this without creating suspicion.
She's amazingly good at telling when somethings up with me and won't rest until she figures out what it is, and saying no to hanging out with her probably wouldn't fly for more then a week, as on average at least 2 nights a week we hang out just me and her, her choice, she even keeps phone convos with her boyfriend short on those nights when he calls. And if I were to randomly be like sorry can't hang out she'd get suspicious and figure it out.
Any ideas as how to do this without creating suspicion?

[shh!]

Tell her you are dating someone new and want to focus on that for a while.

[1averagejoe]

Tell her you are dating someone new and want to focus on that for a while.

I wouldn't do that because she might want to know who. I'd just say that he's busy with something lately. School is always a good excuse. Lots of studying and cramming for tests. Although that will only get you through a couple of times.

Next ones could be something along the lines of family party or something?

I agree with everything that's already been said though. You need to just not hang out with her as much, and if you do hang out with her never alone and always with both of them.

[Zitron]

Why finding excuses? You have been friends for quite some time, so you can just tell her that it is slipping out of your hands, that you have become aware of your more than friendly feelings toward her. Insist that you don't want to damage their relationship thus wanting to stay away from her, as long as your heart is not healed. Be it for a month, half a year or for good. It could also lead to a situation you would not expect, but either way, it is a step forward.

Have to admit I did something like that with a friend of mine and for me it meant (so far) never to see her again. She is married with a children now and we swap a friendly sms on occasion (birthday, namesday, Christmas).

[excowho]

Thanks for the responses guys, I'm going to try my best to limit contact and keep my mind off her.
Definitely proving to be a really hard task.
If stuffs not better in a couple weeks, I'll poke my head back in with a status update.
And seems like a cool place, I may stick around anyway.

Edit: Zitron: I think that telling her now may not be right, but what I'll do is hold out for as along as I can and, I'm not wishing this(well sort of maybe) but I don't want to wish this, but maybe when they're done and shes had some time to re-coop I'll let her know how I feel.

Thanks guys.

[RyanCameronJr]

I was in a similar situation a few years ago. I met a girl at work that I was immediately drawn to, she was talking to a guy (boyfriend) but man I wanted her. I didn't tell her, but she picked up on it. One day after work she gave me her number and said we should hang out. We did..alllll night. Of course she knew I was into her so we discussed that. Little did I know, she was into me too. Long story short, we're not together now but the relationship we formed we still have that bond til this day.

My point is, you only live once. People tend to forget that and live too conservatively. GO FOR IT! Hell, she can only say no.

[excowho]

I was in a similar situation a few years ago. I met a girl at work that I was immediately drawn to, she was talking to a guy (boyfriend) but man I wanted her. I didn't tell her, but she picked up on it. One day after work she gave me her number and said we should hang out. We did..alllll night. Of course she knew I was into her so we discussed that. Little did I know, she was into me too. Long story short, we're not together now but the relationship we formed we still have that bond til this day.

My point is, you only live once. People tend to forget that and live too conservatively. GO FOR IT! Hell, she can only say no.

I think I will eventually go for it, but when the times right and shes single. No I'm not putting it off, just don't want to interfere with the relationship of 2 of my friends.

But figures.
She randomly showed up earlier tonight, just her. Came to the door I answered it I was caught off guard wasn't expecting her at all. I was clearly doing nothing so I couldn't tell her I was busy. So we hung out, and of course it only made things worse.

[all alone]

honestly, i have been in similar situations two or three times and there is literally nothing you can do. If you truly want to stay friends with her, diminish contact only slightly or else like us aid shell inquire and it might backfire on you. But i personally find nothing i do helps in these situtations.

[Dasein]

I was in a similar situation a few years ago. I met a girl at work that I was immediately drawn to, she was talking to a guy (boyfriend) but man I wanted her. I didn't tell her, but she picked up on it. One day after work she gave me her number and said we should hang out. We did..alllll night. Of course she knew I was into her so we discussed that. Little did I know, she was into me too. Long story short, we're not together now but the relationship we formed we still have that bond til this day.

My point is, you only live once. People tend to forget that and live too conservatively. GO FOR IT! Hell, she can only say no.

For goodness sake don't take advice from the spammer.

[sad_soul]

as Zitron said, you should tell her about your feelings, and try to stay away from her for everyone's good. I am sure if you explain it to her she will understand.

if u don't want to tell it to her, then another way would be to find a job that goes till late night, and keep yourself busy with work. So far, what i got from your posts is that, you guys usually hang out at night....so the night job would be perfect. you'll make some extra cash as well. you can then just tell her that you are busy with work.

[agatha]

Keep your feelings towards her.
Don't let her know about it so that she won't be bother.
Keep yourself busy.
Look for a girl who is not committed.

[excowho]

Thanks for all the input guys, I've been doing my best to keep the feelings to a minimum yet they manage to come out regardless, its definitely not getting better she wanted to hang out tonight but I told her I couldn't.

I had a dream last night about her, I've never been big on thinking they have meaning but I must admit I'm slightly curious as to what it could mean.