Other people staring at your date ...

[maxmax]

How would you react, or expect your guy to react, if you were in a restaurant or bar, and other guys were constantly staring at your date?

We were out last night in a restaurant, and the table next to us were four guys. All of them at one point or another were constantly looking over at her, which made her a little paranoid and unconfortable.

She mentioned it a few times and couldn't work out why they kept on staring. I tried to joke it off and just said it was because they were jealous that it was me sat with her, and not them. Although I was joking, there probably was a small element of that!

Now, she is very attractive and was dressed beautifully last night, so I don't blame anyone for not noticing. Staring is another issue however.

A couple of times I looked over at them and smiled, just so that they were aware I could tell they were staring. After the second time I looked over, they stopped, but she still felt quite self-conscious for the rest of the time we were there.

What would you do in such a situation, or what would you expect your date to do?

[kinks]

It's happened to us a few times when we've been out, I think it's because we look like quite an unlikely match. He's done the following things though, stared back at them to which they stopped looking, moved tables, and actually gone up and asked what his problem was :/

[Cerby]

Most reasonable bet is to ask for a new table. There isn't a lot else you can do otherwise, I might look over and wink upon eye contact.

[HeartIsAching]

Being the brash and crude guy I am, I'd look over and say loudly enough for them to hear "Excuse me guys, but you're making the lady uncomfortable with your staring."

[ctr916]

You may have also mentioned she looked pretty cute and the other guys probably couldn't help but notice. Chicks in short skirts or dresses usually have that effect on me.

[MaidenMinx]

I like HIAs response.

Chances are if that had happened to me I would have said something myself. If it was me that was getting uncomfortable I'd say something. Or I would have moved my chair so my back was to them.

Oh and for future reference, asking to move tables can be a pain in the arse manoeuvre. If you feel inclined to ask to move, start by asking your waiter to ask the other table to not be so rude.
Regards, a friendly waitress. :p

[Vanessa]

Being the brash and crude guy I am, I'd look over and say loudly enough for them to hear "Excuse me guys, but you're making the lady uncomfortable with your staring."

Haha top man

Either this or what MaidenMinx said about asking the waiter/waitress to talk to them. Or I might have started off by giving them an unfriendly glare myself. According to my friends when I'm utterly unimpressed I have a 'psycho glare'. Might come in handy.

[surfhb]

It must have been pretty bad if she was uncomfortable with it. Id just move to avoid confrontation

[HeartIsAching]

It must have been pretty bad if she was uncomfortable with it. Id just move to avoid confrontation

That's the beauty of phrasing it the way I did. If you say "Hey, quit looking at my date" then you're just an asshole.

If you say "You're making the lady uncomfortable" then you're being chivalrous.

This is actually something I have to deal with occasionally - my wife is very non-confrontational and wouldn't be at all comfortable saying something to them, and she's also self-conscious and doesn't like people looking at her, which is a problem as she's rather striking: In heels she's an inch taller than me, she's got unusually colored hair and a non-conventional but quite pretty face. Guys look at her a lot if she's not dressed down.

[richardwordoff]

I like HeartIsAching's response in theory, but for me to actually do it would depend on who was doing the staring. If it looked like a few frat boys I'd probably say something but if it were a few mean looking dudes (look like gang members, bikers, etc.). Either way though I'd probably just look over in their direction a couple times. For some real mean looking dudes I'd probably just try to move tables. I prefer not to cause extra conflict, especially if someone looks like they wouldn't think twice about stabbing me.