please spend one minute to read it !

[Sondos]

please spend one minute to read it !
Hi there,
I'm confused about my situation, me and my husband arrived to canada before 6 months and when we arrived I insisted by his family to let his mam come with us one month with us and the next one with his sister and so on, anyway, I tried to refuse and he couldn't do anything because she is his mam

now, I'm working, he still didn't has job and I'm spending my money on him and also on his mam, I don't care about the money but I care about (I didn't feel he care about me and he used me) he told me I love you but only when I'm Ok.

I mean when I'm sick or I need him I never find him, also he doesn't help me in doing the home work , he waits me till I return back and do lunch for me and for him, I called him many times one day told him please I'm so hungry do any thing and he say ok when you will arrived we will do to gather,

me if I'm home and he outside I always prepare food for him ,I never bought for myself anything without buying something in the same price for him - he never asked but I say I should help him because he didn't has job

but at the same time I feel I'm tired return back doing many things and see his mam and many times I saw him not happy , he insist to do baby but if he didn't help me how could I do baby - the baby will be only my responsiblity I know that very well,

so please I need advice , because I have some felling towards him but I feel I'm over to bear more , if I divorce him will the life be easy or I will loose something I didn't feel it now

he is so weak , I'm doing every thing the decission , the responsibility

[Mr. Turtle]

Sondos....

I was in a very similar situation when I was married. I was terrible to my wife because I was trying to be strong and working 2 jobs plus trying to make her happy. She didnt work for a long time. I thought about it so much and it hurt a lot to try and keep us happy. We got a divorce but I think she is better now. I say that if you tell him your feelings and ask him how he honestly feels, start there. Divorce does not mean failure. In the long run its just a piece of paper. You two can try to work at what you both need. I can say that in a way the baby could change him. But if the change is good or bad I dont know. Maybe he feels a lot of pressure from his mam. Ask him. You have to talk to each other. EVERYDAY, even when you dont want to. When you stop talking, you stop caring. And then its over. Good luck, keep us informed.

[Sondos]

I feel many times I don't want talk to him and I always asked him about his feeling: he told me if he don't love me why he is staying with me but I don't trust his feeling (sometimes I feel he loves me because he needs me - I'm just like a mom for him

I really mean it, I feel I have child not husband, so I bothered every thing - I don't want his mam comes any more, and about the sex I don't want to do sex with him and even when I do it - I don't enjoy it just for him - I never let him feel that but I'm acting

I feel it is not my home, I know we will divorce because we talked to each other many time and nothing happen-anyway the time will solve it - I couldn't divorce him also because I'm sure he will loose every thing - he depends on me and I feel sorry about him

thanks any way for your reply, thanks

[vashti]

Tell him his mom can't stay until he has a job because you can't afford to support all three of you. Same goes for a baby. No job - no baby.

Either that, or unload him before you get pregnant and are stuck for good.

[Gigabitch]

A man without a job is in no position to be insisting on a baby. Shame him into shutting up about this.

He sounds like a real loser. maybe he's just having a difficult phase or something, but it doesn't sounds good. He sounds selfish and immature.

Get yourself to Planned Parenthood and get some birth control if you're not already on some. He sounds like the kind of guy who would poke holes in the condoms.

[Sondos]

thanks alot for your replies all of you , I really laughed on this sentence " He sounds like the kind of guy who would poke holes in the condoms". I think we will not stay to gather for along time - The next three or four months will show that.

I feel now, I don't want to return home and see him. he is really selfish person

[IndiReloaded]

Tell him his mom can't stay until he has a job because you can't afford to support all three of you. Same goes for a baby. No job - no baby.

I agree with this^. Please don't allow yourself to be coerced in to getting pregnant. It would be a disaster for you and your child.

[Sondos]

we decided we will divorce because we are very far from each other, thanks alot