Hi guys. Just new to the forum.
My story starts along way back, I met a guy, we got on great, went out for 2 and a half years, and then suddenly one day last July really unexpected he said he wasn't happy any more. I was extremely gutted, and my uncle had not long passed, so I was relying on him to cheer me up at times, which he always did.
I begged for him back every single day for 2 weeks, every night I called him, he'd be out at the pub with his mate, and this new girl on the scene.
Anyway, I decided about 3 weeks later that I would go and see him, I told him the night before that I was coming, and he was to have a good think, because whatever his answer was, I was sticking to it.
I went, and he said no. He wasn't getting back with me ever. Left me no hope etc. I was extremely hurt.
Anyway, I went out 2 nights later, camping. Here I met a guy, wasn't that excited about him, but he was nice to me and made me feel wanted and pretty again etc. So I spent about 2 months with him.
The whole time my ex was asking for me back - begging me. I was being a bitch and saying no, i don't want you any more, you've hurt me - he hasn't. Blah Blah. I never wanted him to have his cake and eat it. Plus I really liked the things he would say to me whilst begging for me back, as he knows himself when we were together he did take me for granted.
So, after 2 months, I realised I was just fooling myself with this new guy, I compared and belittled him to my ex all the time, I spoke about my ex all the time. I was obviously still in love. So I left him.
My ex asked me over about 2 weeks after my split and I explained everything, how I'd felt, why I had done it.
Obviously, he asked questions : did you sleep with him?
The answer was yes, more than once. Wasn't exactly my plan to do so, but these things happen.
My ex then explained he had went to a girls house who had stripped naked in front of him and demanded sex, he says he done it for about 10 seconds, and then got up and left, and then later explained to her online that he was still in love with me and couldn't do it.
He was mad with me. Called me lots of names etc. Said he never wanted to see me again. And I was like, I've heard that before?
Anyway, I left him to it. For the past year now, he's been having me over at weekends, kissing me, cuddling me, sleeping with me, taking me out places. Acting the way it used to be. But keeps saying he can't get back with me. One day he says he loves me, the next he hates me. All he wants to do is be friends. But sometimes when I'm with him I find it hard to believe.
I deeply regret what I done when we split up, I just never thought there was a chance with us again, like he stated. So I tried to force myself to be happy.
I love this guy so damn much. He's the best thing that's ever happened to me. I'm highly doubting I will get him back
What do you guys think? Is there any hope for me?
Well done if you read all this.
Thanks in advance.
ILoveYouMan