Have I lost her forever? PLEASE help me..

[rKiri]

Hi,

I'll write this post as short as possible.

Well, I have been with this girl almost 3 years and we have broke up about 6 weeks ago. I understand what went wrong in a relationship and truly regret that I wasn't mature enough that time. I have grown up and I still love her, always will no matter what..

I haven't contacted her for almost 30 days.
- She blocked me on facebook
- She blocked my phone number
There is no way of communicate her.

However we see eachother in college "SHE ALWAYS LOOK AT ME" and belive me I know what kind of look is this, she miss me but "SHE WOULD NOT TALK TO ME" she's always surronded by her friends in college, sitting all together..

Once I walked to her and asked her if she would like to "TALK" but she "SMILED AND WALKED AWAY" then I just fallowed her few more steps and asked again "HEY, LET'S JUST TALK" then her friend stand up and told me that my ex girlfriend does not want to talk to me..

Now i understand, she probably told friends how NASTY person I'am so it would look bad for her if suddenly she starts talking to me..

She STARES at me whenever I see her,

My question is..

Do you think she still somehow CHECK my facebook? She blocked me but I check her facebook through "spy account" and she likes sad quotes but she does not post any statuses at all!..

I want to KNOW how to contact her?
Does she still check my facebook?
How can I get her back?

MY facebook seem like Im having so much fun in my life, Im trying to hide my emotions and I act just like her, we both act like we NEVER EXISTS FOR EACHOTHER..

It's sad and painful..

[HeartIsAching]

You've lost her forever. Try to learn from your mistakes and move on.

[smackie9]

Damn it! another duplicate thread!!

[nautire]

Hi Kiri,

I think you are still in her heart as much as she is in yours and as long as that is the case, you have not lost her at all. You have not given details of what's happened between you two, but you blame yourself.

Well, if I were you, I will find a way of talking to her privately, and I would declare my love to her as it is! You can only get to someone's heart when you are true and sincere. Otherwise, you will still hurt (and she is surely hurting too) and regret it for life.

You just have to find the courage and leave your ego to one side, and perhaps grab her as you pass by and tell her you need to say something to her... She might find it easier if you have that act of kinda "humiliation" in front of others and believe me, that is not the end. If she takes you back (I'm sure she will), she might try to extend the humiliation for a bit longer precisely because of what you say about you being nasty and her telling her friends... She needs to show some integrity.

Now, I do not know how old you are, but being in college, surely a lot younger than me. I did something with my teenage boyfriend that was not nice but did not realized that I was in love with him until that happened. After three months of missing him like mad, I put on my brave jacket (I was 15, I'm now 36) and approached him when he was with all his mates. Asked him if I could talk to him privately and he said yes (he missed me as much as I missed him). He had me hunging for a good 3 weeks before he took me back and still for a few months he tried to show me that he was not so interested. But he was in love with him and we lasted for a some years after that. We broke up in the end, but not for what I did; I think we were young and needed to explore the world.

Anyway, keep us posted and good luck ;-D

PS I have also open a new thread and would love your input ("I've lost my mind over the sweetest stranger").

[rKiri]

Hi Nautire,

Thank you for your replied. You have made me smile. Im 21 and as I've mentioned early, I have been together with my ex almost 3 years (she's 19 years old) we went through so much together. We both was sexualy active to eachother, sex literally everyday it was a relationship full of passion. We couldn't live without eachother. Once she got pregnant however we wasn't ready for a child so we decided to choose abortion, it sad but we both was not ready for it.

Once a week she slept in my house, the most beautiful thing was to wake up next to her. She never experience such a amazing relationship before, same as me. WE BOTH HAVE HISTORY.

The reason why we broke up is my fault. We was happy until I send her awfull message..

I said - "If you don't want to come to mine then we're done forever I don't want you anymore and Im going to meet other girl" I regret this message so badly, so it was actually me who broke up with her, I only wanted to scare her a little because she wasn't putting much effort in our relationship..

ITS MY FAULT..

After this I ran to her doorstep several times, I begin her to take me back, I have wrote few letters to her and she kept them however her friends started telling her to leave me and she given me all my letters back..

I even tried killmyself, went to her house with bottle of vodka and 50 tablets, told her that my life is over without her, her sister took vodka and tablets from me..

I was NEEDY and DESPERATE..

After this..

I havent contacted her for 30 days, Ive always been checking her facebook, sometimes she likes "Sad quotes" its like she's trying to tell me something.. In 30 days I have achieved so much in my life, I have became a man! I got a place at university and job training as an ASSISTANT ACCOUNTING..

I havent contacted her well 33 days today..

I see her around college, she stares at me and I can see this spark in her EYES (its like she wants to say I MISS YOU) but she does not want to seem sad at front of her friends..

-----

Should I go to her house and try make conversation? I havent been on her doorstep for a 33 days..

As well, few fake accounts are spying on my facebook "Im trying to make my facebook looks like Im having fun in life, I dont post anything sad or I dont even mention her at all" I want to look positive and happy..

----

PS:. Is there a chance for us? I believe there is! and Im not going to give up on her. I look forward for your reply.


Your sincerely..
Lukasz

[HeartIsAching]

LOL, classic. The one sappy newb that gives him the answer he's looking for, and he's all over it.

Give it up fan-boi.

[suddenlynothing]

Unlike others on this site, I won't take the piss out of you for my own satisfaction.

Fella you do need to wise up, don't threaten to kill yourself you bellend!! That's incredibly weak and childish.

It's as simple as this, it's going to hurt, nothing you can do apart from concentrate on yourself and progress.

Your ex will be loving the fact your giving her soooo much attention, bitchies love that shit.

Unfortunately you've made yourself look pathetic! Grab whatever balls you have left and give yourself some pride and self worth at the end of the day she is just one cunt in a world full of cunts.

Your feelings will change, is just emotion. At this moment in time your brain is like a heroin addict, you've gone cold turkey but ride it through.

I guarantee one day you'll look back at yourself in this moment and think "what the ****, was I thinking"

Chin up faggot you'll be fine 👍

Faggot is an endearing comment

[michelle23]

If my bf sent me a message like that, it would be over forever.. trying to make her jealous wont get her attention-just makes you look untrustworthy and weak.. sorry but you blew it.

You could try writing her a letter saying sorry and that you didnt mean it. Good look

[nautire]

Wow, there's a lot more to the story, Lukas. Well, I do not support the tone of the other participants and one has to be in the skin of the other to understand why we behave in certain ways.

To me, there are various elements to your situation:

1) Your attemps to emotionally blackmail your gf before and after. You cannot make people do things they do not want to do or induce feelings (they just happen). So by blackmailing her emotionally, you are creating a certain type of interaction, probably not very healthy for both. Also and most important, you have to think why you do that: it's a way of victimisation of oneself and has nothing to do with her actions but your state of mind. When one is a victim, one is droping the control of the situation. The reality is that you have all the control and CAN choose your behaviours, your feelings and ultimately your fate. So... Get off the horse of victimism and grab the reins! Choose happiness over sadness. What do you think?

2) You've actually already tried to restore the relationship and it has not worked. Two possible reasons that I can think of: she has firmly decided you are not getting back together for whatever reason even if she still misses you. Or the way you have approached your various attempts is always the same and does not work; if you want a different result, you need a new approach. Give yourself time to think, reflect and produce a response for your own benefit, even if that is to move on. Practise guided meditation (YouTube, fantastic, you can even add a theme: meditation to relax, to attract unconditional love...etc).

3) It is very unattractive in a person to have little integrity and to blame others for your own personal non-transferable issues (which in your case is denying that you are the sole responsible one for your feelings and behaviours). It is also SUCH a burden for your ex! I wouldn't want to get back with you if you made me responsible for as "little" of a matter as your own life! Come on, Lukas, think about it...

I genuinely wish you a favourable outcome. But think what that would be for your own sake ;-D

[Wakeup]

I haven't contacted her for almost 30 days.
- She blocked me on facebook
- She blocked my phone number
There is no way of communicate her.

yea and the only reason you've not contacted her for almost 30 days is because she blocked you,

Stop stalking her at school and online because it is detrimental to you getting over her and moving on so that you can eventually be able to see the beauty in other girls. Right now you're being a fool for wanting someone who has blocked you in all ways and told you, in actions that she doesn't want anything else to do with including talking about the break up.

Time to start completely ignoring her (even if you perceive her to be looking at you). The quicker you start, the faster you'll get over her. Don't make yourself out to her fool any longer.

[nautire]

Well, I do not support the tone of the other participants and one has to be in the skin of the other to understand why we behave in certain ways.

Suddenlynothing & Michelle23, the above was not referred to you guys. You were very respectful ;-D

- - - Updated - - -

yea and the only reason you've not contacted her for almost 30 days is because she blocked you,

Stop stalking her at school and online because it is detrimental to you getting over her and moving on so that you can eventually be able to see the beauty in other girls. Right now you're being a fool for wanting someone who has blocked you in all ways and told you, in actions that she doesn't want anything else to do with including talking about the break up.

Time to start completely ignoring her (even if you perceive her to be looking at you). The quicker you start, the faster you'll get over her. Don't make yourself out to her fool any longer.

I like that