I couldn't have handled this worse.

[JF1978]

I feel like the biggest a-hole on the planet tonight.

I was on the 4th date with this absolutly amazing girl. After dinner I sugested we go back to my place and hang out.

The thing is, I was living with my ex-gf and her 6 year old son up until June when we split up. She still has a ton of hers and his stuff here.

As I was giving the new GF the tour of the house, it was very clear that a child had been living here. She asked me, If I had a kid. I broke down at this point.

I told her everything. That I am still friends with the kid's mom. That The mom has agreed to let be still be apart of his life. In fact I am his adult leader for cub scouts.

All of this hit her like a train. She had no idea any of this was coming. I love this new girl with all my heart. I was an emotional wreck through all of this. That just made matters worse.

I feel so bad having her find out about my previous relationship like this. I feel so bad for act so immature over all of this.

I tried telling her about my exgf and kid during dinner and the car ride home but really screwed up. I feel I lied to her even though the subject never came up. I asked her if she feels I lied to her and she said no.

As I walked her to the door I apologized again. She said she needs some time to think. She said we could talk more next week. I asked if I should call her ot her call me. I am so afriad of loosing her. We settled on me calling Monday night.

I hope I didn't screw this up beyond repair. I know after 4 dates and dozens of calls and emails that this is the girl I want to marry. Anyone reading this, please pray for this situation.

JF1978

[hitch]

You broke up with your ex girlfriend in June and you're very much a part of your son's life. If she can't handle you being a good father, maybe she's too immature. What is there to think about for her? And did you think she wasn't going to find out and have the same reaction later on? Seriously, don't stress over this one, and you didn't handle it like an a-hole.

[King Zarathu]

Yeah. You probably ****ed it up, but she doesn't know what she's missing out on.

[vashti]

You went out with someone four times, claim you love her (??!!?), and couldn't find the right time to tell her you had a CHILD to whom you were emotionally attached? You have got to be kidding me!! This is the kind of info you disclose on the FIRST date, not the fourth.

Sorry, but I don't think she is a villain for not wanting to put up with this kind of lie by omission. Some people take the involvement of children in their lives very seriously.

Better luck next time.

[JF1978]

Its my ex-gf's son not mine.

I should have told her what to expect at my place and shouldn't have just pretended everything was normal.

[vashti]

Its my ex-gf's son not mine. .

You were playing daddy, though, so the distinction is negligible.

[JF1978]

What's the magic number of times you go out before you can love someone?

I knew right away what an awesome person she is.

[King Zarathu]

Wrong .

[JF1978]

What's Wrong.

[King Zarathu]

Vashti .

[NeoSeminole]

If it's not your biological kid, then I think this girl is acting immature.

[King Zarathu]

If it's not your biological kid, then I think this girl is acting immature.

Which is why Vashti is wrong.

[Junket]

That's some baggage, I'm not surprised you scared her off.

I mean sucks for you, but who said she was looking for a father and a kid?

[misombra]

lol, this is a funny story.

if you're done being with your ex then you need to tell her to come get her shit. otherwise you'll always have this problem.

[derm]

I was living with my ex-gf and her 6 year old son

How did ye think otherwise?

I dont blame the guy for leaving it this long. 4 dates is really a short space of time if you got so much other important things to talk about. I don't think any single parent would disclose the fact that they are a single parent on a first date in case they would jeopardise the relationship

JF I think she just needs time to get her head around it. She will come good I believe. It's not as if you told her you were a sex offender or a reformed suicide bomber or something. You just need to talk to her and explain, simple enough just talk to her.