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Thread: A bad goodbye

  1. #1
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    A bad goodbye

    So i'm a teenager, who went on a tripto Italy this spring break. On this trip, I met this great girl. We both slowly got in an unofficial relationship, ie not declare boyfriend or girlfriend. All went smoothly until it came to the goodbye. My plan was to give her a romantic kiss goodbye. I suffer from really low self esteem and confidence with women, so I just froze up, and ended up givig her a terrible hug goodbye. Now I'm distraught, and unsure what to do. If we continued the relationship, it would be long distance. I had planned to call her an apologize for the awful goodbye, and see what happened from there, but I'd really like it if you guys could help me out before I potentially mess up again.

  2. #2
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    It was a goodbye, so don't worry if it was not like you had envisioned it to be. If you want to continue the relationship, then call her and tell her how much you like her. But if you don't want to, then don't worry about it.
    Whatever you decide to do, use it as an experience to learn from and help your self-esteem going forward. Confidence is the single biggest attractor there is.

    Good luck.
    Brought to you by Dating With Devon!

  3. #3
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    It wasn't that I thought it was a bad goodbye but that it was less than she expected, and I think she was hurt by that. It was more a see ya later hug than a I care about you and will miss you hug.

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    if its meant to be she will be responsive to you calling her... in fact not kissing her might make her wanting more

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    Is it weird that I still feel very attached to her? She's the first person that I actually had something even resembling a relationship with, which probably plays a big part. She

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sailing Alone View Post
    It wasn't that I thought it was a bad goodbye but that it was less than she expected, and I think she was hurt by that. It was more a see ya later hug than a I care about you and will miss you hug.
    You're probably reading too much into it, but if you have any actual reason to suspect she was hurt by it, then just say something like, "I wish I could have gotten one last kiss from you, but the timing didn't seem right. I don't regret many things in life, but I'm pretty sure I can say that not kissing you before I got on that plane will end up being one of my life's biggest regrets."

    ...Or something. That's probably a bit melodramatic, so change it to something a little more light and flirty, I guess.

    Is it weird that I still feel very attached to her?
    No. Just don't let yourself get too attached. It's just a reality that this probably won't work out, being so young and far away, so stay cool.

  7. #7
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    It's hard not to be too attached, just because of how we just clicked. The fact that we met at camp is probably why we clicked so fast. Plus the fact that it took about four days to get what 17 years couldn't is what makes me really attached, but I'm slowly trying to wean myself off and just see how I feel. I'm upset, but I'm not sure if it's because I screwed up, I miss her, feel like I can't get a girlfriend like her ( by that I mean that felt real, not just "a relationship") or at all, etc.

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