Serious Problem

[Jason27]

I have a big problem. I met my friend's roommate and I really liked her. The problem is that my friend went out of town, and I was never able to see her again. I tried asking my friend for her number, and he made up some story about how moody she is and how "all her other boyfriends left her." I know he's hiding something, because he always encourages me to pursue women. For instance, I liked one woman who I found out was married, and he told me to pursue her anyways . I find it more than a little surprising that he would turn me away from this girl simply because she's moody. I've asked my friend what the problem is a few times, and it seems like he keeps making up stories. Further, he was acting really strange around me the other day, almost implying that he feels more open around his other friends than me - and I've never seen him act this way before. I've told some of my other friends about the situation, and they think that he's hiding something - most of them think that he got rejected by her, and he doesn't want to see me succeed where he failed, but most of my friends don't know him very well.

Another problem is that whenever I try to contact this woman, something goes wrong. For instance, I tried to find her on facebook, and she wasn't available, even though I've seen her post on my friend's wall. I just wish I could figure out what's going on. Does anyone have any idea as to what I should do?

Jason

[Rollerderby]

You met her once?

I was going to guess that maybe he got rejected, too. Send her a message on facebook asking for her number. If she doesn't respond, then that's what it is.

[Jason27]

You met her once?

I met her a couple times. My friend moved before I could get to know her better. I had an interest in her before, but my friend moving is what caused me to feel so attached to her; I felt like I would never see her again.

I was going to guess that maybe he got rejected, too. Send her a message on facebook asking for her number. If she doesn't respond, then that's what it is.

That's the problem. She's invisible on facebook. He is the only way I know of through which I can contact her.

Also, forgive me for being as clueless as I am, but wouldn't her not responding mean that she's simply not interested in me?

Jason

[vashti]

Your friend may ALSO be interested in her, and perhaps hasn't worked up the courage to ask her out yet. Is she worth possibly losing a friend over? How close a friend is he?

Also, are you a sleeze? Maybe he is trying to protect her from you.

[Rollerderby]

I met her a couple times. My friend moved before I could get to know her better. I had an interest in her before, but my friend moving is what caused me to feel so attached to her; I felt like I would never see her again.



That's the problem. She's invisible on facebook. He is the only way I know of through which I can contact her.

Also, forgive me for being as clueless as I am, but wouldn't her not responding mean that she's simply not interested in me?

Jason

EDIT: I should add that I told him when I first asked him that I would tell her that I would be happy to get to know her as a friend, and he told me that that sounds "childish." I find that kind of strange, considering that many men and women become friends. As I said, I didn't know her very well, and I thought that that might be a good way to start off a friendship/relationship. (Maybe this can give you some insight.)

Yeah that's what I meant: if she doesn't respond, then there ya go.

Ah, people always want the unattainable. You missed your chance, and now maybe she's the one! There doesn't seem to be any easy answers for you. Unless you look her up in the good old yellow pages, but most don't use those anymore.

If your friend was going to give you her number, he would have done it already. It seems like he either got rejected, or likes her himself. Do you know if they still keep on contact?

[Jason27]

[quote=vashti;448171]Your friend may ALSO be interested in her, and perhaps hasn't worked up the courage to ask her out yet.[QUOTE]

He has a girlfriend.

Is she worth possibly losing a friend over?

Maybe, maybe not. It depends on how good a friend he really is.

How close a friend is he?

We were very close.

Also, are you a sleeze? Maybe he is trying to protect her from you.

That's kind of a strange question, isn't it? The answer is NO. I respect women, and try to treat them right.

I should add that I told him when I first asked him that I would tell her that I would be happy to get to know her as a friend, and he told me that that sounds "childish." I find that kind of strange, considering that many men and women become friends. As I said, I didn't know her very well, and I thought that that might be a good way to start off a friendship/relationship.

[Jason27]

Yeah that's what I meant: if she doesn't respond, then there ya go.

Ah, people always want the unattainable. You missed your chance, and now maybe she's the one! There doesn't seem to be any easy answers for you. Unless you look her up in the good old yellow pages, but most don't use those anymore.

I tried that. She lives with her parents and I don't know the exact city.

If your friend was going to give you her number, he would have done it already. It seems like he either got rejected, or likes her himself. Do you know if they still keep on contact?

I don't know. He doesn't tell me. He only told me that she's a "good friend of his."

Jason

[Rollerderby]

Ah, people always want the unattainable. You missed your chance, and now maybe she's the one! There doesn't seem to be any easy answers for you. Unless you look her up in the good old yellow pages, but most don't use those anymore.

I tried that. She lives with her parents and I don't know the exact city.



I don't know. He doesn't tell me. He only told me that she's a "good friend of his."

Jason

I suppose, you gotta do what you gotta do. Either keep trying your friend, or come up with a better plan if you really want to pursue her.

[vashti]

That's kind of a strange question, isn't it?

No, it's actually not. Most males want to protect women they care about from players. That doesn't make sense to you?

If he isn't interested in her for himself (which I'm not so sure of), and he considers you a good guy, but he won't set you up with her, then the only possible explanation I can think of is that there is something seriously wrong with HER, and he wants to protect you.