A friend i treated like a girlfriend now doesnt want to speak to me ever again :(

[moonriver1]

Hi everyone, i hope you can offer me some insight into this, as ive even had to take time off work, as has been advised by my doctor, as im having difficulty coping, but heres the story:

I met this girl online, about 4 years ago, i was 22 and she was 19, she lived in wales, and i lived in ireland, after months of talking to each other, we decided to meet up, i came over to visit, and we really liked each other, and started a relationship. But i was only over for the weekend, and had to go home, so on my way home, i thought i wasnt too keen on being with her, and thought maybe in a month it would end, but no, i really got to know her more and more, and then really liked her for who she was, but after 4 months, she ended it with me, only 2 weeks before i was due to come see her again, i was extremely distraught and had to go see my brother in scotland for a few days to get away, but eventually after 3 weeks she spoke to me again, and we became great friends, we realised we had so much in common, even when growing up, we had similarities, id actually come over and see her every so often, so eventually i decided i wanted to move away from ireland, and i had made so much friends through her, that id move to wales, so after knowing her for 2 years at this stage i moved over. Our friendship grow stronger and stronger, i helped her out with so much work for uni, and was always there for her when she needed me, we would talk so much, i once did a word count over a 3 week period of our msn conversations, and it was over 70,000 words exchanged, times we spent together, all we wanted to do, was the same things, think the same, people sometimes thought we were boyfriend and girlfriend, and i truely loved her. I bought a car, in the summer, and that has brought us on many an adventure, we are as spontaneous as the other, in may we randomly went to milan and venice together, we've been all around the UK together, been to ireland for a week, only 3 weeks ago, i showed her my family, friends and surroundings, and she loved it! Ive never met someone who i felt was the female equivalent of myself.

However it was approaching her 24th bday last week, and completely out of the blue, she went onto msn messenger to tell me, she didnt want to speak to me ever again, and wanted me to not contact her, and talk to her friends again, this was a day before her bday party, just over a week ago. Shes since blocked and removed me off of everything i could communicate with her, facebook and msn messenger. Im having a very difficult time trying to cope, and i cant get over her, my life with her was one big adventure, shes still got some of my home friends from ireland on her msn, and she has told them, she wont speak to me again, cause she wants to move on with her life, and wants to find someone else, and was tired of people thinking we were together, i did express an interest to her again, over a month ago, but she brushed it aside, and said she wasnt ready for a relationship yet, and that she loved me and told me to find someone better. Another friend of mine who is a mutal friend here, told me, that she probably felt trapped and couldnt move on and have a proper boyfriend with me around, though she did also tell me, she felt overwhelmed by me. But thats cause i now know i treated her like she was a real girlfriend, i gave her the world, and would have dropped anything to, make sure she was happy, i just wanted her to be happy, and she went and did this to me, last thursday i sent her an email, telling her, i realise what i did wrong was treating her like a girlfriend, and that if im given the chance, ill back away from her, but not to remove me from her life altogether, and since we had so much fun memories, and good times, that it was a shame for it to end. She text me a day later, saying "fair enough about the email, but i still dont think things will change sorry". I dont want to read into it too much, but do you think, if she wanted to completely blank me, then she wouldnt have even sent me the text? do you think she will talk again? Im probably just clutching at straws here, but i feel terrible.

I hope someone can give me some insight, or help.

Thanks,

Ian

[Primo]

She wants a lover, not a friend. It's pretty harsh how she's handling it, but there may be a man in her life now and she's cutting ties with you.

To be honest it's not natural for a man or woman in love with someone to have close friends of the opposite sex. One of the two is always there because there's feelings more than friendship. Go read the tons of threads on here about guys or girls in love with their "friends" and they don't know what to do. There's a million of them.

It's a cold way for her to do it, but some people can be heartless when they want to be, I know some of them too :-) Hate to say it, but time to deal with the pain and move on with your life.