Girlfriend no longer interested in sex / has gone distant

[TheGrimSweeper]

Hey guys looking for some help on this one.

My girlfriend over the past few weeks has gone completely distant and cold on me. She has completely stopped trying to make plans to hang out or anything, its only been me. Whenever I message her she gives very short answers. She has completely stopped saying she loves me and being affectionate in any way. She has gotten incredibly busy (school + working 3 jobs) so we have little time for each other, but its not that that bugs me, its her attitude.

In my head I already know its over. I talked to her last night and she said she doesn't know whats changed, but she doesn't have any desire to sleep with me anymore. She doesnt seem like she wants to breakup, but she also doesn't see how I am happy right now (I'm not). I have a feeling this had to do with me getting laid off a month ago which kind got me really down and as such I started becoming more of a doormat to her and much more submissive. I've got a new job now (really high paying one) but I still am suffering in a bit of depression because of how things are going with my girlfriend. Ive been incredibly nice to her last week, surprising her at work with tea, buying us a cooking class lesson etc but all of this was met with uninterest from her.

I figure I have two options.

1.) End it with her as she clearly is taking me for granted, doesn't respect anymore and walk out with my head held high.

2.) Go completely distant and wait for her to come to me, stop being a doormat and putting up with this terrible behavior.

What would you guys do? I do really love this girl, we've been together a long time (almost 3 years) and ideally I would like things to work out between us, but I no longer know if that is possible.

[vashti]

have you discussed with her the fact that you are considering leaving? I think that is where you should start.

[TheGrimSweeper]

I think she is starting to realize it now, We had a talk last night, it ended with me saying I don't know about us anymore, she gave me a big hug and kiss and then left. Afterwards I messaged her saying that when she has some time we need to talk. Im going to leave it totally in her court now.

Whenever I bring it up she never seems to really want to talk about it.

[vashti]

Good. Maybe she has some issues with you that need addressing. Be ready to hear about them, and good luck.