does the chase ever end?

[Illusional]

alright, i know that people long for relationships reguardless of their age. yes, even those lonely grandparents long to be with another person reguardless.

however, i was talking to my lady friend (whose 38 btw). she's single and currently looking for a man to spend the rest of her life with. this kinda relates to the settling for anyone thread. i am just wondering what everything thinks about this.... when do you actually stop chasing for a relationship and just let something come to you if anything.

my friend still goes out clubbing and what not. she has been dating off and on like a regular college person. however, most or all of these relationships haven't lead to anything solid. by now, you would think that she would just live life single, but she refuses to and continues to go out and party. your thoughts??

raverboy

[shh!]

Partying is probably not the best way for her to find a mate, but I sympathize with her desire to connect. I don't think waiting for someone to come along is necessarily the answer, it is probably better to be proactive. I would just be looking in another venue. It would be hard to compete with 24 year old party girls!

[whaywardj]

It's important to spend time alone with yourself to discover your own nature. How you fill your days and weeks months creates patterns of behavior that see you in the environments you choose for yourself. There, you meet others who've chosen to spend their time in the same or similar places as you, and who, most likely, have similar interests as you. Ironically, being alone increases the odds you'll meet someone compatible.

[Asip4u]

Partying is probably not the best way for her to find a mate, but I sympathize with her desire to connect. I don't think waiting for someone to come along is necessarily the answer, it is probably better to be proactive. I would just be looking in another venue. It would be hard to compete with 24 year old party girls!

---I agree with this post---

[Only-virgins]

Unless she told you she parties to find a life long mate then I agree....other then that...why cant old people have fun..hell...I can see my self clubbing when im 40. No one really cares. I am never going to marry because its the "time" too. I will either find the person that blows me away or I prefer to be single.

[marcus23]

Why do you think that 38 old woman can't compete with younger girls? I've seen many 38 old woman better looking than youngsters.

[Illusional]

well her partying if a lot different that i would party as OV stated. i party hard, basically to the point that i'm so drunk off my ass, i will pass out with blank spots that happen during the night. her partying is more reserved being she has been through this stage in her life already.

so whayward's response, i'm sure that she is content with her life. she feels that she has acheived her dream job of becoming a teacher, she has her own condo and a few years ago, i know that she recently bought herself a brand new truck. however, i would think that not everyone wants to spend the rest of their life alone. many people desire spending time with their own children, which is why she chose per profession.

in reguards to asip4u, well my friend also doesn't feel or look the age of 38. she wouldn't mind a younger man, however, she is find with whoever, it's the personality that really matters. so she likes to have fun that your typical 38 year old married woman, there is nothing wrong with that. also being that she comes out with us and we are party animals.

raverboy

[whaywardj]

There's this odd idea out there among youngsters that life, somehow, ends after 35. On the other hand, from the height of 50 or more years, you look back on 20-somethings and wonder how they managed to stay alive even THAT long.

[Junket]

The chase ends here.

[Chlorine]

Illusional----"when do you actually stop chasing for a relationship and just let something come to you if anything."

She'll probably stop chasing when she gets busy with something in her life. Something that makes her focus outwards. Not inwards on herself.

[shh!]

Why do you think that 38 old woman can't compete with younger girls? I've seen many 38 old woman better looking than youngsters.

Yes, there are exceptions, but look at who 38 year old men are usually dating - it isn't 38 year old women!

She'll probably stop chasing when she gets busy with something in her life. Something that makes her focus outwards. Not inwards on herself..

Good point!

why cant old people have fun.. ..

Ouch! 38 is old? That hurt!

[Prodigal]

There's this odd idea out there among youngsters that life, somehow, ends after 35. On the other hand, from the height of 50 or more years, you look back on 20-somethings and wonder how they managed to stay alive even THAT long.

I think that there is a lot that can be learned from you. In fact, I think there is a lot I can learn from you. Very interesting thoughts that never even crossed my mind... probably because I'm one of those looking from the other side.

[whaywardj]

Why, thank you Prodigal. I'm flattered you feel that way. Now, since you expressed an interest, I COULD, for a small fee...

[artyemi]

Life doesn't end at 35, I don't think. I just think it gets less fun because if you go out and do crazy things, you can't blame it on age, unless you're senile.

[whaywardj]

Hm. Got a point there, Arty. It IS easier to f*ck up when you're young enough to claim stupidity.