How do I get the message across??? Does he not get it?

[MissK]

I recently found out that the guy I like also likes me but after being put on the spot by his friend about me said he didnt want a girlfriend.
I dont think he knows that I know he said this and has since continued acting the way he has always done with me. We talk and flirt or so I thought.
I dont think my signals get through to him though, occassionally when we talk I will put my hand on his arm etc when making a point and smile at him a lot etc. I'm beginning to get fed up of waiting for him to do something and now think I should make a move.
The problem is, I have no idea how! I'm wondering if I continue to flirt but in a different way that is more obvious (any suggestions?) or to come straight out and tell him exactly how I feel. Also, if I told him how I felt is it alright to do this by email?
The only thing I'm worried about is that he is such a nice guy and we've only really just started becoming good friends so if he truly isnt interested then I dont want to ruin our friendship.
Any advice would be much appreciated...
KC

[gsgann22]

Don't flirt more openly, don't do this by e-mail, just ask him on a date. Just ask him to go to a movie, to dinner, whatever and at some point hold his hand. He'll let you know if he is interested and you can act accordingly, now don't be suprised if he lets you pay afterall you asked him out but if he is a nice guy he will offer.

[sfalexi]

IMO, if they're not a boyfriend/girlfriend, they shouldn't be a friend. It'll only lead to you hoping that something's gonna happen, which it's not. And it'll just make every minute that you spend with them (which will be a lot because you'll want to go out with them HOPING they'll change their mind) unbearable and frustrating. Then they start talking to you about other girls in their life and you feel upset about them pouring out their problems to you when you wish that YOU were with them, etc. etc. blah blah blah. It's all very cliche.

So my attitude is we're either dating, or we're not hanging out at all and I'm looking for someone that IS interested in getting to know me as more than friends.

Alexi

[Junket]

Why are you waiting for HIM to do something?

[MissK]

Thanks for your replies.
I was waiting for him to do something because I'm a shy person and I generally think the guy should make the first move.
As for the belief that boys and girls cannot be simply friends I dont quite agree, not am I only romantically attracted to this guy but I think he's genuinely a great person who I would consider a friend. There are other guys who I'm mates with but we arent romantically attracted to each other.
I just dont totally feel comfortable asking him out on a date at this stage, obviously it would end up that way soon but in the mean time what else could I do until I feel I'm ready for that to happen. It's just that I'm not totally sure that he is interested and I dont want to come straight out and ask him on a date at this stage.
But if we were at a party etc and sitting next to each other, how can I get the message across without appearing to forward etc???
Thanks,

[Junket]

How about you jump up and down screaming "ask me out!" Otherwise you might as well be bangin' your head against the wall.