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Thread: how important are looks

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
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    how important are looks

    after an interesting conversation i had with two dear friends i started thinking about the importance of appearance in relationships. what can i say, i start thinking after talking with people i appreciate and you are getting to see some of the questions that run in my head.
    i was wondering what is the importance of appearances in the beginning of a relationship, how much weight they have in determining if the person will have an opportunity to get a chance to show us there other sides, and how many people we miss out because at first glance we overlook them.
    if all participants in this relationship game know that they need to impress the other side aren't we dealing with a show, and if the purpous of meeting new people is to find a friend/lover isn't this intention missed? when is it o.k to let your guards down and stop performing, if its ever o.k? and if we are performing isn't it deceiving the other person?
    does it change with age/experience/desperation? and if it does , does it mean we are settling down for second best?
    is it different for male and females and if the object is a candidate to be a friend or lover?
    im not trying to be naive or coy but i always thought that although looks are important to some extent they are not the dominant thing that makes a person attractive, and as you get to know a person there importance in determining the attractiveness diminishes. attractiveness is composed of many things like wit, intelligence, passionate soul, kindness, the ability to dream, friendship and more.
    or am i the freak for thinking like that????
    id like to know what you think
    p.s-isn't tattoos cover of the smiths "how soon is now" an abomination???how can anyone ruin this song???????????

    "I am extraordinary, if you'd ever get to know me,
    I am extraordinary, I am just your ordinary
    Average every day sane psycho Supergoddess"

  2. #2
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    my opinion is, looks are important. they arent going to be the glue that keeps people together by any means. but i think you need to be (at least i know i need to be) physically attracted to someone, in order to be interested in them. that's not to say i will keep liking the person if they happen to be pyschotic or bitchy...etc..etc.

    i would just say it is ONE of the many things that bring (and keep) people together.

  3. #3
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    Id say it is just a quick starting point. Obviously, if you are disagusted by the person's appearance you wont want to be around them. But if theyre good enough looking to talk to, I think that;s all that is needed.

  4. #4
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    Fashionably sound - Not necessary.

    Hygenically sound - NECESSARY.
    "I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see."
    - John Burroughs

  5. #5
    Illusional's Avatar
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    the truth from my eyes... looks are very important to me. i'm a picky person and i feel that looks is the first impression that you get from a girl. it's the looks that will catch your eye and make a lasting impression.

    now when you get to know a person and personality comes into play, looks aren't as important because you fall in love with their personality. looks however is the foundation that you're interest builds on. raverboy
    ...this is just my perspective on the situation...

  6. #6
    peshkunta's Avatar
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    People are tricked by nature...like puppets on a string...like robots programmed with specific instructions - "multiply."

    Of course looks matter. That is to ensure that your offspring will be healthy/beautiful. Although there are always exceptions - some of the most beautiful people I've seen, have unattractive parents...you have no idea.

    There is a theory that one likes in someone what they don't have...almost to complete themselves - the offspring gets the best of both. I think that we all have a mechanism for atomatically/subconciously picking the right person that would produce good offspring - eventhough we don't know what our children will look like, our subconscious probably does to an extent.

    If you want me to go totally technical with you, studies have shown that babies tend to look longer at an attractive person.

    And you don't have to be a rocket scientist to be aware of the fact that beautiful people are treated nicer by society and have a better chance of getting a job...to name a few.

    Think about it!

    Last edited by peshkunta; 09-08-03 at 05:44 PM.

  7. #7
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    in love...

    looks get you in, personality keeps you there.

    the beginning of life is cry.

  8. #8
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    Nature has a lot to do with picking the most "attractive" person so I agree with the previous post. But you have to temper that with our higher brains. Look for someone who has good character, generous, etc.

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