Well, I'm kind of an introverted person. I rarely call people or talk to them much in reality. There's this one girl though. She always came up and talked to me during school. Our converstations were usually very short. However, we talked a LOT online.
The thing is, I really really like her. But at a party, this guy met her and started holding hands with her and flirting and stuff and she didn't mind. I don't know what to do now.
I never told her that I liked her. And I mean I REALLY like her. If she disappeared from my life, I don't know what I would do... If I don't tell her that I like her, we might still have our conversations online, which are probably the highlights of my life. If I do tell her, she could say she doesn't like me in that way and life would go on.
But what if she doesn't reject me? I'm not asking her out, just telling her I like her. But what then? I know very little about socialism and dating. I don't know when to call, where to go, what to do, behavior stuffs... I don't want to disappoint her. I'm also very shy and it's hard to get me talking in reality. Also, I'm 14, she's 16. I'm afraid that if I tell her, 1) her attitude towards me will change and the talks that we had won't return, and 2) she will expect me to ask her out, which I'm not sure I'm ready to do. Plus, I don't have a car since I'm 14. How will we get to different places?
Worst thing is, I have to act now and be direct like this, or the guy will become her bf...I can't afford to lose her. I wanted to progress gradually, you know, start meeting each other. But I don't know if I'm ready for dating yet! And I don't know if she likes me.
Fact is, I wanna still talk to her about normal stuffs instead of just romantic datey stuffs after I tell her. Like how was her day, and philosophy and such.
But I love the girl with all my heart. I can't lose her, I just can't...
HELP!!! I am SO lost. Please, somebody, enlighten me on this...
Sorry for the random topic skipping. I'm just recording my stream of consciousness.