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Thread: Ex boyfriend help, scared he's moving on.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
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    Female
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    1

    Ex boyfriend help, scared he's moving on.

    Ok so I have a massive problem here. My boyfriend of three years broke up with me nearly five weeks ago as he had begun texting another girl after meeting her on a night out. We had a great relationship (genuinely were best friends) but in the last couple of months, I was going through a stressful period at work and wasn't much fun to be around and also started to resent the new group of friends he had started to hang out with which caused arguments. There had been talk of him and I moving in together soon and we'd also jokingly talked of marriage prior to the beginning of the end of our relationship (we are 23), which may have made him feel trapped and contributed to the break up. As he was breaking up with me, I said I wanted to do whatever it took to work at it but he felt it would be too 'forced'. He also said he'd been considering doing it for a while now, so I guess the new girl was the final push he needed.
    Now he is coming out with our mutual friends less and less and going out with the new group more and there is an extremely strong possibility that he is now seeing the girl he was texting from this group.
    I've tried to ask him to meet up with me to discuss things and he has cancelled on me twice now, giving the lamest excuses. Just frustrates me that he agrees to meet then changes his mind last minute! But then on other occasions he has hugged me and flirted with me, so confusing!
    I can see clear as day what I was doing now that was pushing him away and I badly want to try again and rectify this but he seems so wrapped up in this new girl and group to even meet with me to talk.
    So should I go off his radar for a bit and wait a few weeks to try again when the shine may have gone from his new relationship? I'm just scared the longer this goes on, the less chance we have of coming back from this as he may fall for the new girl? Will he miss what we had if i'd been pushing him away for a while before the break up? Every morning I wake up and can't believe this has happened to us. I know we can be happy again, just need him to realise this!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    76
    Welcome to the world of shit pixie =/

    Your situation is very simliar to mine and I feel your pain. Unfortunately there isn't much you can do. If your relationship was breaking down and he was drifting from you, you can't really do anything to make him love you again. He needs to realize that on his own.

    My ex hangs with her new group of friends more than our old ones, she's also seeing some new guy and it's gut wrenching. There's nothing I can do because every time I see her and open my mouth, I come across as needy, depressed and pathetic and that won't make her come running back to me any time soon. Our relationship ended for a reason, so did yours.. situations change and for whatever reason the other person just wasn't into us anymore. These things happen.

    Just don't contact him, don't chase him. He knows how you feel, and if you guys were meant to be, he'll find reasons to contact you and be around you. The more you guilt and pressure him, the less inclined he'll be to speak to you as it's just depressing.

    Good luck.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
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    Male
    Posts
    4,622
    Your relationship with him is over - it really is that simple, And yes it's shite but that's life

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    LA, Ca
    Posts
    59
    it's over. he clearly doesn't want to talk with you aso move on.

    give yourself some credit. anyone who makes you feel that way doesn't deserve you. there are a lot of guys out there, leave him alone.

    the best thing you can do is learn from your mistakes. you said you now see what you did wrong, then don't do it again in your next relationship but also remember that guys who won't bear with your worst, does not deserve your best.

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