Why are girls nicer on phone over online?

[Exeter19]

I have a friend who I like o/s and she is a sweetheart on the phone and miss hostile online. It is confusing, you'd think online she could fake nicer more online not on a phone call.
Why so different on each mode of communication. Anyone know what could cause that? Thx

[basilandthyme]

it's because talking on the phone is easier and more pleasant

[Exeter19]

so is that how she really is when she talks to me on the phone and online she doesn't know how to convey her real self to me? i will talk to her on a messenger chat and what she types looks real nasty bitchy to me so i will go ok, that's about all i am going to take for the night and she'll go WHY? what to phone talk? and I go ok for 10 mins and she is back to being great again. i like her but i hate the miss jekyll and hyde act. Thx.

[basilandthyme]

No, the real her is how she behaves face to face. You never really know somebody until you spend a substantial amount of face to face time with them.

[IslandScorp]

First of all, I hate online chatting and texting. You can't hear the inflection in a person's voice and feel what they're saying. Because of this, some people come off badly online or texting or even in emails. They say something they think sounds cute or normal and it ends up sounding rude or abrupt. A friend of mine just made a comment to me the other day - about how she needs to watch what she types in an email because she realized that she tends to sound too blunt or rude. I think you should just try to talk to this person more by phone and get to know her well that way. It's the only way that you'll see if she's really a sweetheart or not.

[Ginger2013]

Yes I agree, texting leaves too much to misinterpretation. You are assuming her attitude and tone when you read her texts by thinking she's being bitchy, she might be happy and giggly when she writes them - it's just impossible to know. I would pay more attention to how people react in person or over the phone.

[Exeter19]

She lives in the UK and we have never met irl, only over a gaming website and then to emails, chat and calls. i am planning to go over in about a year, so unless she plans to travel here before then, not likely it won't be a for another year to see her face to face. if her attitude online persists, i won't bother meeting her when i go.

[Exeter19]

it isn't really in her texts, they are short, not much tone to take off those, it is mailing emails and online messenger chatting, that she gets horrid. @islandscorp. yes the same as your friend is, exactly.

[Exeter19]

@ginger2013 that is true i could be reading tone where she personally types with none, but lots look like she is being a crank and moody for no reason and very blunt. almost as if trying to verbally abuse. but on the phone sweet as can be.
Thx

[Ginger2013]

@ginger2013 that is true i could be reading tone where she personally types with none, but lots look like she is being a crank and moody for no reason and very blunt. almost as if trying to verbally abuse. but on the phone sweet as can be.
Thx

Weird...next time you're on the phone with her, why not just ask her about it? Mention something like "I got the impression you didn't really want to chat the other day" or something like that...You don't have to say she came off as bitchy, but maybe that she seemed short with you, then see how the discussion goes?

[Exeter19]

Thx, ginger. i did tell her one of the last times it happened and she asked to phone talk, and btw on the phone talks i always pay for the calls, so i wondered if she is nice because i pay for them and she doesn't, so its like don't bite the hand thing. rofl, that sounds bad but something is strange with her moods and when she is chatting online. i will ask again but more directly and to the point, if she takes offense is ok as long as she is honest about why the 2 different personalities with me.

[Ginger2013]

Thx, ginger. i did tell her one of the last times it happened and she asked to phone talk, and btw on the phone talks i always pay for the calls, so i wondered if she is nice because i pay for them and she doesn't, so its like don't bite the hand thing. rofl, that sounds bad but something is strange with her moods and when she is chatting online. i will ask again but more directly and to the point, if she takes offense is ok as long as she is honest about why the 2 different personalities with me.

Good idea. A direct question leads to no misinterpretation! Good luck.

[Exeter19]

Thx ginger for the help and the good luck i'll update this thread after i ask her more directly, hope i don't get hostile internet her on the phone if i do off that direct question i think i will not talk to her any place for awhile afterwards.

[Ginger2013]

Yeah, I mean, someone who plays the hot and cold game, or is moody like that...it's kind of a turn off. There are lots of girls out there if this one doesn't work out.

[Starnique]

Basil is right. Also to add, sometimes things online can be misinterpreted. It may come off as being rude but if said in person or over the phone, its a lot different.