Opinions Needed

[LaMb ChOp]

..........

[Wakeup]

My opinion is that you did nothing wrong except you tried to get to know him after you had sex instead of before you did. The relationship had nothing else to it but the sex. Had you asked him to take you out and do something fun with you a few times and then found out what his dating goals were (by outright asking him) prior to having sex with him, then I suspect he would have told you (if he was honest) that he only wanted a casual sexual relationship with you.

His actions from the moment you met him were not to get to know you in any way of substance but rather to get you into bed.

You've only been separated from your marriage for 6 weeks... I wonder why you're jumping into things so quickly when you're barely out of that relationship? Also: The very fact that his ex is still very much in the picture tells you that he isn't finished with his last relationship 100% yet either. Stay away from people who haven't processed things and their ex isn't totally out of the picture.

Two red flags here that you ignored:
1) His soul attempt with you was to bed you which was apparent by his request to get to your place as soon as possible and his lack of wanting to get to know you by doing fun things outside of yours or his place.

2) His girlfriend starting what she started when she saw the two of you together should not have been ignored. That should have been your clue to high-tale it away from him and his baggage.

3) You forgot to pay attention to his actions that, if you looked you'd have seen that his only interest was in sex and nothing more except watching movies with you that led to sex. Not much substance there.

It's not like he was headed towards a relationship with you and then you did or said something that changed his mind... he never had any intentions of having more than booty calls the whole time.

[oneandonly]

Aren't you tired of guessing if he is acting the way he is cos what you said something or someone said something or whatever? Wouldn't it be rather easier to take what he said 'isn't looking for more than just sex right now' at face value? His actions seem to show exactly that.

[LaMb ChOp]

..........

[Wakeup]

Well, if you want some advice that is keeping your best interests in mind, you'll change up the dynamic of this situation starting immediately.

Stop just having inside your place or his place type dates. If he's too stupid or doesn't have the motivation to ask you out to do something fun, then I suggest you do the asking here and if he declines then he has zero, zero, zero interest in getting to know you past the nooks and crannys of your body.

You like this guy and you will get more hurt everytime you fvck him and he doesn't see you on important dates like your birthday or his for that matter. You need to find out, without a doubt if he's interested in you or just your gennies. See if he'll be with you outside of the bedroom. That is the first place you need to suss out.

If you want a relationship with some substance to it, you need to have more than just sex going for you. Just because he still wants to see you doesn't mean he wants to see you for more than just booty so in your own best interests, mix it up and see where he'll let you take him.

[VincenzoG91]

2) His girlfriend starting what she started when she saw the two of you together should not have been ignored. That should have been your clue to high-tale it away from him and his baggage.

This is a huge red flag that this guy is a complete a-hole. He probably kissed the OP just to try to hurt her ("her" meaning the ex). At best, he displayed an almost psychopathic lack of empathy for a fellow human being. OP should have backed away from him right after his ex got bounced. Also, his very pushy behavior shows that he isn't that concerned with the OP's needs either.

[Wakeup]

I agree, Vincenzo. There are several red flags that Lamb has ignored. Lamby... you seem very naive and rather jonesing for a relationship with this guy. Calm down and find out if...

1) He's being sexually exclusive with you (somehow I doubt it.. I actually think he has one of you in every surfing site he splashes in) If he's not, then you need to ask him for that. If he declines you sexual exclusivity then you need to make some decisions here.. Do you really want to be one of many who waits her turn to be serviced?

2) If he's willing to go on real dates with you or he's only interested in you in bed.

3) He's not interested in a relationship ~ you need to believe that.

You have no idea who this guy is at this point and you allowed him to sleep at your place after knowing him not even 24 hours. For all you know he's a mass murderer, a sociopath, or a promiscuous ball freak.