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Thread: when the female takes control

  1. #1
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    when the female takes control

    Hi there, I am intrigued to know what your opinions are if the lady does some pursuing.

    The gentleman who has caused a flutter in my heart most recently seems to be in need of some encouragement.

    We met randomly about 6 weeks ago, had a lengthy chat, had a lot in common, he gave me his card, I called him the following week, we went to see a band about 10 days later on his suggestion. We had a lovely night, he sent a text the following day, there were a few lengthy texts from him that followed, then they stopped. I was on holiday for 3 weeks and emailed him last week on my return, in a reasonably light way, offering a chance to see another band with me. He was freindly by return and open to it but pretty casual. He is very busy with his job and a very long commute, which he says will all get better next week. When I realised how busy he was, I backed off a little and he replied to in his last email that I should keep him informed of the bands gigs, which I think I can take as a semi-positive sign.

    I would appreciate any thoughts. Thank you,
    Love yourself first and be true to yourself. Be kind. Have confidence in your own advice - you are probably right. Freckle

  2. #2
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    I love it when the lady does the pursuing...takes a lot of the pressure and stress off of us. Equal rights and all that!
    Frasbee caught me doing something naughty with my signature. He told me that if I continue to do so, he'll bend me over his knee and ban my ass.

  3. #3
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    I think you should pursue...

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    OK, the game goes on. I sent him the details of when the band will play and he has asked for a raincheck as he has family visiting. I'm cool with that, no feelings of rejection as such but I do think I have lobbed the ball far enough into his side of the tennis court now. Whay say you gentlemen? There are other very nice jets in my radar, so to speak, although it was the tunes on his ipod that made my heart sing, metaphorically at the very least.
    Love yourself first and be true to yourself. Be kind. Have confidence in your own advice - you are probably right. Freckle

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by kyleargyle View Post
    I love it when the lady does the pursuing...takes a lot of the pressure and stress off of us. Equal rights and all that!
    I second that
    Many questions answered.... Many answers questioned

  6. #6
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    But Derm and other lovely gentlemen, Is there a point at which the lady should retire or withdraw to preserve her dignity? My Catholic upbringing and 3 brothers taught me that if a girl is too available or enthusiastic she loses her allure anyway? You cant mean to be telling me that they all lied to me. LOL
    Love yourself first and be true to yourself. Be kind. Have confidence in your own advice - you are probably right. Freckle

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Freckle View Post
    But Derm and other lovely gentlemen, Is there a point at which the lady should retire or withdraw to preserve her dignity? My Catholic upbringing and 3 brothers taught me that if a girl is too available or enthusiastic she loses her allure anyway? You cant mean to be telling me that they all lied to me. LOL
    Freckle, You can pursue but in a subtle way. You can go so far as in you can be flirty, chatty and available without comming accross as desperate.

    But there is a fine line and I do think that you have done your part. Give him some space and see what happens.
    Many questions answered.... Many answers questioned

  8. #8
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    Freckle, you're right. Any more pursuing would probably damage your cause, not help it. Although it probably would better your chances of a drunken booty call.

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    Enough with the games already. Just have a good time.

  10. #10
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    i love it when the girl chases. much more reassuring. i like to see the girl is eager and wants to be with me, etc.

    now if this convo was talking about sex, then oh god. thats always fun...heheheh

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