This girl I used to work with developed a crush on me. I kinda knew she had a crush on me because whenever I'd turn around she'd be staring at my backside. Ahem. Anyway, one day her friend convinced me to ask her out. I don't know why, but I caved in. Bad idea.
I asked her if she wanted to head into DC and catch a show at the Improv. She agreed. The following Friday I show up at her place in decent threads. She opens the door in sweatpants and a sweater. Like she was going for a jog or some shit. Ugh. We get in the car and right off the bat she whips out a pack of cigarettes and starts smoking. And smoking. And smoking. The instant she finished one cigarette she just lit up another.
We get to the club and everyone there is dressed nicely. Except my date who looked like trash. The comedian sucked. The food was terrible. The conversation worse. We had nothing at all in common. We wound up talking about getting horribly drunk and puking in various places. Which was actually kind of amusing. I dropped her off at her place. She kind of hesitated at the door like she expected me to make a move. She reeked so bad of cigarettes, though, that the idea of touching her made me physically ill.
God, so atrocious in the Old Testament, so attractive in the New--the Jekyl and Hyde of sacred romance.
-Mark Twain
If people are good only because they fear punishment and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
-Albert Einstein