An old, foreign love story (both the hubby and the wife are dead) -Part 1

[calev]

What’s being told today is only a love story, the story of a lad who passed away when he was only 30, and the journey of his love for 13 years. This lad was my husband, Jose.
What a handsome lad
When I just started getting to know Jose, he wasn’t even 18 years old. It was on a Christmas Eve, he came to greet us at the place of a friend of mine, while I was there also.
There is a custom in Spain, and that is when it is just over 12 o’clock at night Christmas Eve, the people would greet all their neighbours, the neighbours upstairs and the neighbours downstairs, and say “Peace”. It’s a bit like the custom of our Chinese New Year visitation. Then, Jose just ran downstairs, and when I just saw him, I was shocked, thinking: how could there be such a handsome guy in the world? If one day I could become his wife, I would be satisfied even in my vainglory. That was my first impression of Jose. Not long after that, I was visiting this friend of mine quite often, and Jose was living nearby. There was a very big yard just behind the apartment, so we played baseball there quite often, or had snow fights when it snowed; and sometimes we also just went to walk around in a second hand market. We didn’t have much money in our pockets, so usually I could wander in the market from 9 to 4, and finally probably I just bought a feather, by then, Jose was in his 3rd year in senior high school, and I was in my 3rd year in uni.
Cousin’s here!
One day while I was reading in my dorm, my Spanish friends came to tell me “Echo, your cousin’s downstairs, to visit you”. Now, the word cousin in Spanish could be used to make fun of people. These friends were shouting “Cousin’s here! Cousin’s here!”
I was confused, I don’t have a cousin, how could there be a cousin in Spain? So I went to the balcony, and there I saw Jose. He was standing there with some books carried, holding a French hat he was wearing a lot, and he looked so nervous.
He was young, thus he did not dare to enter the lounge. So there he was, waiting for me under a tree. I ran downstairs, went to him with a bit of anger. I pushed him, saying “Why are you here?” He didn’t answer. “Your classes are not finished, aren’t they?” He answered, “I don’t want to attend the last 2 classes.” I then asked, “What are you doing here?” Because I thought I was quite older than him, I was talking to him as an elder sister to a younger boy. He took out 14 pesos, and said, “I’ve got 14 pesos, it’s just enough for both of us to see a movie, would you like to come with me? But we have to walk there, because there isn’t any more money for transport.” I had a look at him. I’ a very sensitive person, so I just felt there was something wrong of this kid, yet I still agreed him, and suggested to go to a nearby cinema, so that we would not need any transport. And he skipped his class the next day, and the day after, the fourth day…
So there he was, under the tree, always holding a French hat rather than wearing it and he became a joke in our dorm. The friends always shouted “cousin’s here!” And every time I ran downstairs, I always either give a push to him or a hit, telling him not to come again, “you can’t just always skip classes like this!” For he always skipped the last 2 classes, and he often came to see me. Because neither of us had money, so we just took walks on the street, or went to the Palace to have a look, or to pick some wastes from the junk place, and sometimes we would be surprised to find something appealing “Hey, have a look at this steel nail, quite nice eh? …” Gradually I found that we should continue our relationship like this, for this lad was serious, but he hadn’t been in uni yet. Yet to speak frankly, I quite liked him.
Wait for me for another 6 years!
One day, it was very cold, and we had nowhere to go to, so we placed the chairs next to the vent of the underground railway, so that the heat would come out to heat us when a train passed by. And we two looked like 2 beggars, freezingly cold, sitting on the chair. I then said to Jose “from now on, don’t come to see me again.” Why would I speak to him like that? Because he told me, seriously “Wait for me for another 6 years, that I finish my uni in 4 years, finish my civil service in 2 years, and then we could marry. I have a with of my lifetime, and that is I could live in a small apartment, with a wife like you, and I work to provide you, and this is the happiest wish of my life. … I can’t get any warmth from my family.” I felt like crying when I heard him telling me this wish of him, I told him “Jose, you’re only 18, I’m much older than you, and please dream no more like this, from now on, don’t come to see me again; and even if you stand under that tree again, I would not come out, because 6 years is a long time, I don’t know where I would be by then, and I don’t want to wait for you for 6 years. Listen to me please, don’t stick to me, otherwise, I would be afraid.” He was stunned, and then asked “Did I do anything wrong?” “No, you didn’t do anything wrong, but just because you’re so nice, I don’t want to further our relationship.” Then I stood up, and he stood up as well, and we walked to a park of the Royal Palace in Madrid. There was a small hill inside there, and I told him “Let me stand here, watch you leaving, and this is the last time, please, for ever, do not come back again.” He said “Then let me stand here watching you leave.” I said “No! No! No! I stand here, watch you leaving, and please listen to me, never come back again.” I was afraid that he would come back, so I said “From now on, I’ll hang out with other guys from my class, I can’t be with you any more.” But I started getting anxious after I said these words, afraid that I would hurt this lad who just had his first relationship. Normally the emotions of the people in their first relationship are fragile. He then said “Well, I won’t come back again, but please do not treat me like a child. For these several weeks of dating, you were always treating me like a child. You told me not to come back again, and I did think about it, unless you are happy, I will never come back to you again.”

[calev]

Echo, Bye!
It was already dark after that conversation, he started to run slowly, turning his head back while running, with a smile on his face, shouting “Echo, adios! Echo, adios!” I stood there, watching him. It hardly snows in Madrid, yet, snow fell from the sky that night. Jose was running on that hill, waving his French hat, turning his eyes back. I nearly couldn’t help to shout “Jose! Come back!” when I saw he gradually disappeared into the dark night and white snow. Yet I said nothing. Whenever I was reading the scene of Baoyu the main character becoming a monk in the novel “The Red Mansion Dream”, I always remembered how Jose was running, shouting “Echo, adios! Echo, adios!” that year when he was 18, on that vast empty ground covered with snow.
He never came back again after he left. Later when I saw Jose on the street, while hanging out with my classmates, he always ritually held my hands, kissed my cheeks, saying “Hola!” And my response was “Jose! Hola, this is my boyfriend blah blah” He then would shake his hand.
He’s grown up now, with a beard!
Then, it was 6 years, I finished my studies, and went back to Taiwan. While in Taiwan, a friend from Spain asked me “You still remember Jose?” “Yes, I do!” “Oh, he’s different now, has a beard, and also grown up.” “Really!” “Here’s a letter he wrote with a photo, you want to read it?” Surprised, I said “OK!” For he was still in my heart. But that friend said “He said, if you have forgotten him, then don’t read it.” My answer was “Heaven knows that I never forgot this man, but I just thought he being younger than me, and he was serious, so I didn’t want to hurt him.” I got the letter from the friend, a photo fell out, on the photo was a man with a beard catching fish in the sea. Opened the letter, it said “after so many years, maybe you have already forgotten how to speak Spanish, yet I want to tell you a secret, that snowy night when I was 18, you told me you never wanted to see me again, did you know I cried for the whole night, wetting my pillow, wanted to end my life? So many years, do you still remember me? The appointment was after 6 years.” I didn’t reply, left the letter aside, told the friend “Please tell him that I got the letter, and thank him for me.” Half a year later, I had some trouble in my relationships, then I left Taiwan, went back to Spain.

Jose, I’m back!
Just then, Jose was doing his final month of civil service, his younger sister always wanted me to write to Jose, I said “I can’t write Spanish anymore, how do I write a letter?” then she wrote a letter, asked me to fill something in. Then I wrote an English letter to his troop, saying “Jose, I’m Echo, I’m back, this is my address: …” Then the letter arrived there, but no one there understood English, so Jose wrote a letter to me, telling me that he couldn’t understand what I was saying, so he couldn’t reply me. He also sent many pictures of scuba divers to me, pointing one “this is me”. I didn’t reply, then he called me from the south “I go back to Madrid on the 23rd, wait for me!” by the 23rd, I totally forgot about it, so I went to another town with a classmate, when I returned home, my flatmate told me that there had been a guy made a dozen of calls after me. I couldn’t think of any guy would call me. Just then I got a phone call from a friend, telling me that there was an urgency to be discussed about, that I should take a taxi there. I immediately went there on taxi, she led me to the living room, asked me to close my eyes. I didn’t know what she was doing, so I quenched my fists, put them behind me, in case that she would scare me by putting animals on my hands. When I closed my eyes, I heard someone walking towards me, then I heard the friend telling me that she was going out, yet I was still asked to keep my eyes closed. Suddenly, 2 arms hugged me. I shivered, opened my eyes and I saw Jose was standing right in front of me. I screamed out of excitement. I was punching him, yet also held his face to kiss him. The people standing out of the living room all laughed, because they all knew, though Jose and I were not lovers, we felt good about each other. We met again, just 6 years later after I farewelled Jose.