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Thread: Help me understand this girl :)

  1. #1
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    Mar 2010
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    Help me understand this girl :)

    A month ago, this girl I was unofficially seeing for 2 months said she needed to be by herself as she had a lot going on (family etc etc and is working 7 days in August, then back to only 2 days in September) and said she didn't think she could continue seeing me.

    All was good as I understood.

    A week ago a friend of ours had her birthday celebration, and she was there....we said hi, but did not talk to each other...it felt weird, she left whilst I went toilet, so I asked her why she'd left, and she said her sister was coming down to see her which was true.

    Later that night she text me asking me if I was o.k. and we ended up talking till 1am about general normal things. I feel so strongly about this girl, in a way I can't say what I feel because she asked to be alone...it felt really good to talk to her.

    Yesterday, I invited her to come out with our two other friends, at first she said she had work (she did) and had to take her mum to the hospital (she did)...but couple hours later she text me saying she was coming as work told her not to come in. She was quiet unless I talked and the convo was nice once we did, she was on her phone texting all the time, dunno why...and she didn't even say goodbye, maybe because busy train :s

    Were both in our early 20's.......I'm stuck in this situation and dunno what to do.

  2. #2
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    Texting while hanging out with you? I HATE when people do that. She didnt even say goodbye???? Um, I'de let her be. Let her contact you and stop giving her so much attention. She's luke warm at best and I could never settle for that. She's kinda giving you the cold shoulder some times but just enough attention to keep you interested. Maybe she does still have a lot going on with her family, In any case I would give her some space and tell her to contact you when she has time for you.

  3. #3
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    It pains me to say this, but you're here for advice, not for ass-kissing.

    A girl in her early twenties that plays with her phone during a conversation?

    What do you think does that tell me about you? [That's not an offense!]

    When reading "unofficially seeing", I immediately thought of you as someone who's caught up in a completely one-sided thing.

    Is it possible that there's some truth to that, or am I totally off the mark?

    Anyway, from what you provided as background information, I'd say she's not interested. I could be wrong, though.

    Then again: Would YOU act that way if YOU were interested?
    Love Is A Mother****er

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by IncognitoSir View Post
    Texting while hanging out with you? I HATE when people do that. She didnt even say goodbye???? Um, I'de let her be. Let her contact you and stop giving her so much attention. She's luke warm at best and I could never settle for that. She's kinda giving you the cold shoulder some times but just enough attention to keep you interested. Maybe she does still have a lot going on with her family, In any case I would give her some space and tell her to contact you when she has time for you.

    This is the thing...I dont know what shes thinking, im stuggling to just let go.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Progressus View Post
    When reading "unofficially seeing", I immediately thought of you as someone who's caught up in a completely one-sided thing.
    We were dating but we never said we were together.

  6. #6
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    for a girl in her early 20's she sounds pretty immature. you really want to 'date' a girl who's acting like an embarassed teen? even if she found it awkward she should act her age and 'bite the bullet'.
    They called us a dead generation,
    They told us that we wouldn't survive
    They left us alone in the maelstrom
    As you can see we're all clearly alive.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by kitkitkitty View Post
    for a girl in her early 20's she sounds pretty immature. you really want to 'date' a girl who's acting like an embarassed teen? even if she found it awkward she should act her age and 'bite the bullet'.
    Well, she was asked to be left alone, I did, but when it came to going out with our friends we had to as I didn't want no negativity.

    Now...like you said kitty, the immature attitude, thats what confusing me!

  8. #8
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    yeah if she agreed to go out she should've made an effort. i honestly think she's gona keep messing you around like this so i'd say leave it before you start getting really attached to her. you no longer need to understand, just accept and leave her to it.
    They called us a dead generation,
    They told us that we wouldn't survive
    They left us alone in the maelstrom
    As you can see we're all clearly alive.

  9. #9
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    Mar 2010
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    Yeah, I've learned my lesson before with chasing woman for all the wrong reasons, I honestly really like this girl and theres something keeping me hanging but I dunno what, I don't initiate conversations with her (calling/texting), and neither does she to me.

    It's the lack of understanding thats killing me tbh, if I knew exactly what she was feeling, good or bad, this would be a much easier task for me to handle.

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